For Discussion: Blair vs. SerenaS

Welcome to the Gawker Locker Room: where maturity goes to die! Here your host and toastmaster Furious George will present a topic of discussion for open commentary, vigorous debate, and potential masturbatory purposes. Our topics will be diverse, random, juvenile, and vitally important. Today's topic: Who to screw? You see, as something of a traditionalist, I like WASPy blondes with big babylons. At the same time, I have been known to enjoy the company of snotty, spoiled, shark-toothed brunettes with daddy issues. Not surprisingly, watching a show like Gossip Girl is, for me, an exercise in existential quandary. Which to choose? Which to taste? Which to plow, gently, while Simon Le Bon asks us both to "Come Undone" in the candle-lit glow of my boudoir? And so I turn to you, gentle readers, and I ask thee: Who would you rather fuck, why, and how: Serena van der Woodsen or Blair Waldorf? Please elaborate in no fewer than 100 words, single-spaced. Cite relevant examples from the show Gossip Girl whenever possible.