Is Drew Barrymore Laughing All The Way To The Altar?

Putting Drew Barrymore's last relationship with Fab from The Strokes aside, the girl does seem to fancy the funnymen (Tom Green, Zach Braff, and recent boytoy Justin Long among them). But after seeing beach pics reminiscent of those painfully staged Heidi and Spencer photos, we're wondering if all this gooeyness means that yet another Drew Dating Disaster is in store. Among the comments made in her cover story from this month's Vogue: "My cheeks hurt, I'm so happy." Long's gushy response? "She makes my cheeks hurt too." Plus, Drew is apparently fond of calling him her "gentleman caller" (nice to see someone is still reading Tennessee Williams). And then there's the kicker: as Oprah's website reveals, Drew and Justin are set to make a "worldwide announcement" on Monday's show...

Sounds like bad news to us. Of course, this forces us to dredge up the painful memories of that gleeful marriage proposal that Tom Green made on SNL in 2000, which ended up with Drew playing the part of runaway bride. Another thing we noticed? All these lesser-famous paramours of Drew seem to have one thing in common: after the inevitable breakups, their star power coincidentally takes a well-timed leap...

For example, Fabrizio Moretti had always been "the hot one" among The Strokes, but after hooking up with Drew, he earned mag profiles and spreads, and raging hordes of new female fans. Then there was Tom, who we suspect may not have even been asked to host SNL if it weren't for the potential presence of Drew in the audience. And Long? He's gone from That Annoying Mac Guy to Next Big Thing ever since word spread that the two had met and fallen for each other on the set of He's Just Not That Into You. We can only pray that this "worldwide announcement" involves not yet another live proposal, but the very first live break-up on national television.

[Photo Credit: BauerGriffin]

UPDATE! Us has mysteriously removed their story featuring those beachy pics. Developing...