Thanks to my SXSW party tipsters, these are labels I now use to classify my Gmail: "Startup orgy," "PR/ostitute op," "Shenanigans?" To get on my schedule, please get your solicitation in now. By the time I get to Austin, I'll be booked solid. Three events I've picked to maximize your own chances: Frog Design's opening party, because designers are always better-looking; The Bigg Digg Shindigg, where I'll be nerdspotting with Julia Allison; and The People-Powered Party, sponsored by Etsy, Threadless, Moo, and Timbuk2 — a crowd full of natural-born showoffs. Not enough action? Check the complete SXSWi party map. Personal note to the big tease who's planning a post-SXSW orgy: Send the final address to firstname.lastname@example.org.