Gawker
Yesterday evening, we all met "Kristen", the adorable whore who accidentally destroyed the career of New York Governor Eliot Spitzer. Her (non-whoring, show biz) name: Ashley Alexandra Dupre. The New York Times tracked her down and even linked to her (still live, amazingly) MySpace page, so everyone in America immediately listened to her demo (she wants to be an R&B star!) and fell in love. Below, your roundup of internet minutiae and breaking life-destroying news about Ashley "Alexandra Dupre" "Kristen" Youmans-DiPietro. Her neighbors! Her high school photo! Even her new second hot R&B single! All after the jump!
- The consensus? She's kinda adorable! She's sincere and cute and her song isn't that bad! (Will it become an ironic club hit for a weekend? Probably! At ironic clubs!)
- The Daily News got her high school photo (at right). She was a bit more "Jersey Shore" then. Also they tracked down some old high school classmates who basically call her a slut.
- The Post says she wasn't slutty in high school. IMPORTANT NEWS, PEOPLE.
- She has a fake Tumblr!
- She has refused to leave her Flatiron apartment all day long. We know this because cable networks are camped out outside, and they periodically break in to let us know that they still haven't seen her.
- We got an insane email that insisted that she is 32, not 22, and asked whether we or the New York Times even have fact-checkers. Well, we don't. But we're still pretty sure she is actually 22.
- Here is her modeling portfolio.
- OMG she hurriedly added a new song to her Amie Street profile. She is going to make this work for her.
- Another emailer writes to announce that even her neighbors are hot. So we've attached their pictures too.
Her Neighbors:
Comments
reality TV needs her.
Based upon a purely superficial analysis, her neighbors are clearly also prostitutes!
Why are we trying to make her a star?
What's wrong with things today in general is that we make celebrities out of people who have done nothing. Those who have actually achieved something on their own merits get largely unrecognized.
And no, fucking someone is not a merit. It's that type of thinking that gave us KFed, Marla Maples and Lewinsky.
We had a Governor who sold us a bill of goods of his having integrity and he didn't have any and had to resign in shame. THAT'S the story. Who this girl is is incidental.
This is not only for Gawker but for those of the media who is now feeding all over this. It's dumb. We've lost 12 soldiers in Iraq in, what, 2 months or weeks? I dunno. Why? Cause I've been forced to imagine this girl going down on Spitzer.
Let's end this.
We don't need aother horse face.
Ohhh. Dupre.
*another
Hey, now
Even her neighbor Christina Wang is rushing out a new single -- "Ain't Just a Neighbor". Everybody is going to benefit from this.
@The Real JR: You are so harshing on my mellow.
@Destonio: nice work.
@Destonio: Take it over to myspace, bud.
What kind of fantasy land apartment building is this, and how is it not crumbling under the weight of all the beauty products?
So everything I learned from Julia Roberts movies was wrong?
@fiveinchtaint: See my theory above. It's a home for wayward girls from NJ/Queens with aspirations of making it to the "big time," who, "for now," will settle for fast cash from rich men.
I sent her a Myspace friends request. Curious to see if she accepts or not. I'm excited to leave inappropriate comments on her page.
Pimps and drug dealers get to be rap stars. Give the ho a contract.
Street-ho, not $1,000-an-hour, pretty
Too late to call dibs on Wang?
@TheHonJudgeSmails:
dude, don't fucking spell it out. you're going to raise the demand/prices!
She hasn't left her flatiron apartment in 24 hours because she is recording an *album* people. She has important work to do before her 15 minutes are up.
@The Real JR: your argument is laughable until you make the things you mention boring. somehow i don't think you have that power.
@ThighHigh: Amen!
@The Real JR: Next time you testify in front of a Federal grand jury, drop us a line. Granted, I can find additional folks for the next "Profiles in Courage" collection, but she's ai'right. Suspiciously, however, I got her first single for $0.26. Tell Steve Jobs I won't buy a stinking iPod Touch now that her song's at $1.
Oh hai! Iz slot frum teh Durtee Jerz! I can haz recurd contrak?
Also, she lived in North Carolina! Briefly, but still.
(My streak of NC posts continues...)
@TheHonJudgeSmails: If I walk over there in a fur coat with a top hat and a cane, do you think I could score an interview? I'm working from home today - it's not out of the question. That's right, Kutcher - you're not the only one with these brilliant ideas!
@fiveinchtaint: That's genius.
Prospective criminals take note of this rather impressive business model.
@fiveinchtaint: That is a commie nommie, I do believe.
In her uglier pictures she looks like Danyelle Freeman.
Enough of this. I want details. What kind of classical music? How long? Are cigars and brandy involved? What kind of sex scandal is this without the nitty gritty? Don't they teach the who, what, when, where and whys in J-school anymore?
Reality TV Shows Ideas:
Queer Eye for the Flesh Fly: Carson Kressley, Ted Allen, Tim Gunn and Christian Siriano do a life-makeover for Ashley.
Jersey Shore Whore Corps: A group of New Jersey prostitutes live together, fight together, shower together, run a business together.
From Three-Star to Superstar: Ashley Alexandra Dupre makes it big in New York City.
You, Me, and Dupre: Ashley Alexandra Dupre moves into a newlywed couple's home and tests the foundation of the new couple's marriage by overstaying her welcome.
Worst Post headline ever:
HIS STAFF IS SORE AT GETTING THE SHAFT
The next Jessica Hahn..?
How did she afford to get all the work done? Because, one assumes she could not have become high-end call-girl status until she became, generically hot. Meez iz confuuzed.
let's make fun of the girl some more. hahahaha!
@AndIAmTellingYou: I'm sure they tried for:
HIS STAFF IS SORE FROM GETTING FUCKED IN THE ASS...METAPHORICALLY
...but alas, a line must be drawn somewhere.
I would like to live in her building. Her neighbors are hot.
I don't think it's exclusively looks here, the whole idea is you have someone intelligent and witty that lets you give anal.
And we all know Jersey Girls give anal and financial advice at the same time. Well I don't know. You do. You. Not me.
Cut me some slack, this event affects me not at all.
It's not like there's not already a bunch of whores working in the music/show business...
Dude, her building looks expensive. Maybe she should've considered moving to Brooklyn or Washington Heights before going that whole whore route?
"Hos Ho Ho Hoing": Ashley works as a mall Santa Claus.
"Project Streetwalk": Christian Siriano designs clothing for Ashley so that she can become a 7-diamond hooker
Ashley, Ashley
Kristen, Kristen
DiPietro-Youmans-Dupré
Took great care of her May-or
Though her diamonds were only three
@The Real JR:
I don't know about you, but personally, I'm not "trying to make her a star." I just listened to two songs that I think are not bad at all, and so I bought them both.
Admittedly, if she hadn't fucked the governor of NY, I probably would never had heard of her. But it's not like she was the one who went running all over town bragging about it or anything.
I'm just sayin.
@The Real JR: Um . . . you do realize you're reading Gawker, right? Anyway, I wouldn't worry too much about Ashley Alexandra Dupre becoming too big a "star." Rest assured her notoriety and attention-worthy status will flame out fast -- in much the same way as that of the two bimbos/singer-songwriters revealed to have diddled Christy Brinkley's most recent ex . . .
Dupre's Diamond Rag ..?
She kinda has that Karl Malden thing happening.
Real JR, this is what Gawker is made for.
"I'd be like, dude, you want the gossip or not?"
There once was a sweetheart named Kristen
Whom the governor paid, put his bits in
She gained fame like Lewinsky
Or even Kaczynski
And her website got millions of hits in.
Please do! I'd do it but I am too busy. @fiveinchtaint:
@The Real JR: I'm kinda with you on this. Until and unless the angle is how the press insists on taking her purty mouth (Oh! What she must do with it!) and trying to twist it into a story about political corruption; or until/as she attempts to profit from her notoriety. Should she. And I've heard her songs, and lordy, that hardly counts.
"Jersey Shore" is an adjective? That can't be a good thing.
a duet with Whitney?
a cameo by Redman?
Treach from naughty by nature (now porn producer i thinks) directing a gangbang vid of aforementioned harlot by the re-united Onyx?
call it Tricks in Da Bricks? maybe Queen Latifah and Joe Buddens running train on her?
reppin dirty jerz to the fullest
This is insanity. I'm firmly in the 'stop the madness' camp on this one. We need to just forget this crap and move on. She's a troubled girl who decided to be a prostitute probably because thats all she could do to make some money. Whatever. There are probably another hundred-thousand of them in Manhattan alone, and nobody is shoving a camera in their face. Why would they? Because her john was powerful and got caught, and theirs didn't? Good, make him the story. I personally don't want to see another famous-for-no-reason nitwit/slut with a reality show, magazine spread, album, and movie deal to be worshiped by other misguided teenage girls into thinking that prostitution/general unproductive whorishness is a legitimate and even admirable goal in life. Have you seen myspace/stickam/the internet in general? Females of this generation are in a lot of trouble as it is.
Oh and shes worth maybe $1200, tops.
she's already more interesting than julia allison.
How many surnames does this gal have? Was she on the run from the law or desperately -- and persistenly -- trying to change her persona? She shoulda taken a page from the playbooks of her top MySpace pals/ star marketing 101 and taken one a one-name moniker.
Any takers on what our Ashley's should be?
AAD, indeed.
Three-D?
Why is nobody standing up for the noble, healing aspects of the profession of courtesanship in all its myriad forms? But I am! I've paid for it and I'm proud!
Why isn't anybody standing up for the noble, healing aspects of the profession of courtes