Dawn Wells: 'My Pot Arrest Was Part Of Massive Law Enforcement Cover Up...Got Any Funyuns?'

It seems the rapid internet proliferation of a story about Dawn Wells getting picked up in Idaho with weed in her car—along with the most adorable mugshot in celebrity DUI history—wasn't quite as hilarious to its hero. The actress, best known for playing the wholesome-girl-next-door-half of Gilligan's Island's classic sex-object dichotomy (versus the island's far more experienced cougar, Lovey), has now gone directly to Entertainment Tonight to clear up any misconceptions about her nonexistent herb-indulging habits:

"I need to put the kibosh on rumors. It was my birthday and I was coming from a dinner."
"The marijuana found in the car was not mine. The marijuana charge was dismissed and the person whom it belonged to went to jail. There was no DUI charge. I want to make it clear that I was charged with a traffic offense."

The police report states that Wells failed a field sobriety test. Wells insists the test was improperly administered and the officer, who had only been out of school for a few months, is currently under investigation. The report also states that Wells had picked up three hitchhikers, to which Wells says, "I've never given a ride to hitchhikers in my life. I don't know where that came from."

She does admit that her driving was reckless, "I was weaving. I was trying to turn on the heater and was in an unfamiliar car. But I've only had one ticket in my life and I was going 7 miles over the speed limit."

Hopefully that will put an end to the harmful and irresponsible rumors that tried to make Wells out to be some kind of baked-driving hard-toker, just because an incompetent rookie found pot in her car after stopping her for weaving across an open highway. Still, we know how stoners, however misguided, love coronating their own, so Wells shouldn't be too surprised when she gets the call informing her she'll be feted with a Lifetime Doober's Award at next year's High Times Stonies.