Anderson, we all love you, and are glad to hear that you're okay.

You see Anderson? Thats what you get for being at the Chelsea Piers every saturday during the summer in your speedo!

Or was I dreaming that?

I've had a few of those carved off. You get them from spending too much time on beaches without sunblock. I don't know how hurricanes fit into it.

While I was absent from work for the last couple of days, Mrs. Dweeb pointed out a spot of dry skin under one of my eyes.

Little did I know, but she was giving me SYMPATHY CANCER!

I'll be interested to know if he still has that "fatty deposit" under his left eye after this minor surgery.

I'd just imagine it was from his face slamming into a headboard. Actually, I still will.

While you're in, get all those nips and tucks taken care of so you'll be drop-dead gorgeous on Fire Island this summer.

@Truculent: He can't evade detection there. My friends run the ferries. No closetted gay celeb makes it to Fire Island without my hearing about it.

@Truculent: But really, is it possible for him to be anything else but?

It was actually a biopsy to check for traces of gayness. You can never be too sure.

Would a Roadhouse reference be out of turn here? "It's my way or the eye way?"

Given that my favorite blues singer from senior year just died of weird eyeball cancer, and my current favorite blues singer was just diagnosed with pancreatic cancer, I don't wanna hear Coop singin' no blues.

So Andy, clarify please, how does fisting affect one's face?

He just needs to grab hold of that ol' gayness and give it a great big public hug in front of everyone. Really, how much public shock and outrage could he cause, after Spitzer, McGreevy, and the rest? Hell, at this point Caligula could get elected governor with overwhelming popular support.

@vibe-rater: it puts a smile on it?

@Truculent: I volunteer to give his gayness a great big public hug too.

@the supergoddess: go, girlfren!

He is a cute as a kitty in a basket. The problem is the basket is in a closet. Come out, li'l kitty! Come out! The you can haz boyfriendz! ^_^@@@~~

@vibe-rater: if there's fisting involved? I'll go and go and go and go...

@Truculent: wait, anderson cooper is running for governor?

Arbus Cooper Baby.jpg

Recent Substitute Hosts on Regis & Kelly:
Clay Aiken
Neil Patrick Harris
Anderson Cooper...
C'mon Coop!

I posted a couple days ago that Cooper was out for a couple days because he was on his way to Iraq and would be reporting from there tonight. Well, I was wrong. The 360 commercials made it sound like he'd be doing that and that's just the sort of thing he would do.
Hope he takes care of himself and gets some extra strong sunblock, whether he's in Iraq or on Fire Island.

@Truculent: Your California friends didn't vote?

@nowmedusa: In what state? Can we move there?

Okay, Charlie "I tripped and fell" Rose has a black eye, now Anderson "I have cancer" Cooper will sport a shiner. Oh, I'm putting two and two together and it's not looking so good for you Brian "I'll give you something to cry about" Williams!

What a fox.

o dearz. Somebody find me a paper bag to to breathe into. I'm having a meltdown.

I don't understand why everyone wants AC to out himself and destroy whatever slim ephemeral hope we ladies still hold out. Why must you ruin it for us? Some of us have invested a lot of time and energy into constructing elaborate fantasy lives around Anderson Cooper, aka my boyfriend. Leave the Grey Fox alone!!1!11!

How dare you call him "America's Boyfriend"? He is MY boyfriend, so please, in the future check your facts and get it straight.

I'm sure I'll run into him at the Ice Palace this summer. Gay, straight, or whatever, they all get to the Ice Palace and we all have a jolly good time.

@wundersmack: Step off bitch. He's mine.

Candlelight vigil begins at sunset.