Someone has been reading my diary...er, blog.

I'm sure they will get back together again.

Well who the hell is MJ engaged to now? I MUST KNOW.

Last line should read: "And then you hit rock bottom (literally) and have hatesex with Vin Diesel.

At least they offer the "it's complicated" option for depicting your relationship status. I use that one. Of course, i would prefer to use WTF but they don't offer it.

@Mike_Jahn: Nor do they offer FUBAR, Dunzo, Ova, Sex Only, or Lesbian Bed Death. Damn Facebook!

CodePink is single.
CodePink is eternally single.
CodePink is dwelling in singledom.
CodePink is the playa of the year (ie, single).
CodePink is a singularity (black hole of singledom).

@BettyCrocker:
this seems like the last line that works in every situation and conversation.

@mitchel_stevens: It would work for me! Assuming he doesn't have a doll collection.

Oh, I love the relationship status "thingy" on facebook! I get to see half of the people that got married too early go from "married" to "its complicated" to "single". Schadenfreude, holla!

I didn't facebook-break-up with my last girlfriend until several weeks after we really broke up. I didn't want to face the public humiliation.

I do believe they are well beyond caring about being publicly embarrassed.

Nothing validates one's desirability like a little pink heart. Lust for me, O World.

I wonder how porn star Erik Rhodes, their threesome partner, is handling the breakup. Is he Team Marc or Team Jason?

Nothing hurts more then watching the other person change your relationship status when you don't know your breaking up!!!

Come to think of it, a pretty good Facebook relationship status designator would be "I only take cash."

Relationship Status: I don't have a girlfriend...I just know a girl who would be really pissed if she heard me say that.

@Mike_Jahn: Also: Pot whore.

How can I make mine so I'm both in a relationship and looking for whatever I can get?

I love how after I break up on facebook all my scummy ex-bfs suddenly message me, "hi! how are you sweeite??".

Part of the joy of starting a new relationship is advertising that fact to one's exes who stalk via Facebook, etc.

@creamsissle: Living loud is the best revenge.

my last girlfriend totally yelled at me about my single status on facebook. so i changed it. i shouldn't have been surprised that she used her status to break up with me. fuck you, facebook.

UGH I got the broken heart by my name yesterday! No one has inquired if I'm okay or contacted me in any sympathetic way.

@redscorpse: yeah.

@hammerimissu & creamsissle : true. but, I get the exes (and pseudo-exes) who refuse to believe my "status" on Facebook and Myspace. or, at least, they pretend to need it explained to them. that, and all of the pictures of my fiance on my facebook/myspace.

Hello? You're not that stupid (otherwise we'd never have fucked in the first place); and I'm not giving it up tonight, no matter how confused you act, how trashed we get together, nor how good I remember the oral to be.

I'm also a fan of the hopeful IM, when they quit said networking sites. I like to mindfuck, so much that I'm getting my master's in it. So, yeah: then we meet up at rock shows, and get smashed together, again.

Facebook does add perspective, however. While one person's minifeed will say "

so-and-so is single, broken heart," the another's proclaims "so-and-so is single, heart." Mixed, messages, Zuckerberg. That's when things get extra complicated.

The worst part is that once you change your status to single, all of the ads that show up on your page are a desperate attempt to get your laid again, all the while reminding you that you've just been totally fucked over by your ex.

"Tired of dating, just wanna fuck? Click here!"

"Need to find a single man? You've come to the right place!"

"Lonely, pathetic, solitary? We know! We're watching you!"

This too is brilliant. With LolCait's comment and this post, I feel like the old Gawker is back!

@Trixie from Toronto: Word. Nice job, Rebecca. Charmingly written.

Back in the days of friendster, I started dating this girl and she was a bit more serious about the relationship than I was, so she ultimately confronted me about it. I changed my status to "open marriage" and so did she. Fast forward to now where we've been broken up for a year and I'm still hung up on her. Wait, I had a point here - oh yeah, I shouldn't have slept with that other girl.
Fiddlesticks.

I'm confused as to what to do about the pictures. I have a lot of pictures of me and my significant other... on Valentine's Day, on our Anniversary, even just out with friends, we're holding hands and kissing.

If we break up, do I delete all those photo? What will a new potential mate think?

This is making me rethink making my current lover facebook-official.

So much better to proclaim onesself "in an open relationship" with a close friend, and have everyone wonder if you're actually expressing latent lesbian tendencies.

My best friend and I were very bored one day, and tired of getting the relationship updates, so we made up our own fake boyfriends on facebook. We gave them interesting profiles with cute pictures reflective of our perfect guy. We tagged them in dark and ambiguous pictures, and waited for the add-friends to roll in. Sure enough, the newsfeed did it's job well. Some people thought it was stupid, but we thought it was funny... and a little bit exhilarating. It was especially great when our friends would call to ask about the new mystery relationship. One of my closest girlfriends was actually really upset that I had never told her anything about him before! When I "broke it off", I got a lot of "whatever happened to that hot guy?!" I would just smile and say "It was so surreal. In the end, he just turned out to be very fake." If anybody wants to be friends with my fake ex, his name is Gaven Mackensie. We're still friends, so I'll make sure he adds you. ;-)

@FitnessMadeSimple: RIP, Mitch.

@Walden3: Yes. Possible latent lesbian tendencies are most amusing diversions...