Gawker
George Clooney has jokes. His latest celebrity-based antics: a swarm of paparazzi descended upon his house in Italy after a (false) rumor spread that Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie were going to be getting married there. Clooney, who was away working, heard about this, and ordered 15 large wedding tables to be set up on the house's lawn. The paps went crazy [Hollyscoop]! Clooney laughed. He's a funny guy. But there's more to this than just a friendly joke. Because George Clooney, one of the biggest celebrities in the world, doesn't just want to make himself chuckle; he wants to undermine the entire celebrity economy that gives him his lofty position in the first place.
First, it must be acknowledged that Clooney is a smart man. He's not a grown-up version of Ashton Kutcher, an airheaded frat boy pulling practical jokes that a team of writers dreamed up. Clooney may be a frat boy type and a practical joker, but he knows exactly what he's doing. He has a very solid reason for every career-related move that he makes; look at the crafty, political way he chooses his movies. Except that new one about the old-timey football thing—who knows what that's all about.
The point is, Clooney sees the big picture. Recall his response to the original unveiling of the "Gawker Stalker" map. While lots of celebrities moaned about the intrusion into their privacy and imagined ridiculous implications for their personal safety, Clooney actually had a plan: he told a bunch of entertainment publicists to flood the site with false tips, thereby rendering it useless. It turned out that the Stalker maps are hardly a threat to anyone, and the flood of outrageous fake tips that Clooney inspired eventually disappeared. But he did prove that he was thinking about how to fight back against the celebrity-industrial complex, and even came up with an effective strategy—more than you can say for Brad Pitt, whose decision to fire his publicist will (prediction!) fail to magically allow him to disappear from the eyes of the media.
The problem is that Clooney is a CORNERSTONE of that very same complex. A man who ambitiously rose from a bit part of "The Facts Of Life" to a place in the pantheon of outrageously famous movie stars is hardly a credible spokesman for the cause of anti-publicity. On top of that, the press that Clooney gets is, by celebrity standards, pretty positive. It's impossible to argue that the very same paparazzi and tabloid media that he deplores have not, on balance, been a boon to his career.
And look at it from the poor, poor entertainment reporter's perspective: without some effort at critical coverage, they are bound to feel like nothing more than tools of the equally powerful movie marketing machine. Sure, staking out every nightclub, restaurant, and dwelling place of a celebrity is not really hard-hitting, or even socially redeeming, reporting. But Clooney, whose father was himself a newsman, should understand that it's all part of the package of being a star—a deal that he surely enjoys.
The actor would doubtless say that he supports real journalism, which is all well and good. So do we! But Americans have an unfortunate taste for the minutiae of the lives of their big screen heroes. So perhaps some sort of bargain can be struck. The tabloids can promise to take Clooney's earnest projects seriously, and in return, he can throw them a bone by accepting that his social life will always appear in the gossip pages and on the blogs, until he chooses to retire into obscurity. Besides, even if he were to enlist each and every one of his celebrity friends in his cause of punking the media, it would never work—that story in and of itself would be covered to death, resulting in a level of scrutiny that's equal to the one that the Hollywood types already receive.
So let's all just get along, in the words of famous celebrity Rodney King. Except, of course, for those pranks on the paparazzi. Go right ahead with that. Nobody can stand those guys, anyhow.
Comments
Clooney's definitely holding up his end of the tabloid bargain. By having a new 25-year-old actress or model girlfriend every week, he gives them something to write about and a chance to run a photo of a hot babe. If he wants to waste thousands of dollars that could be going to needy orphans on a few practical jokes, that's his choice.
Meh. And I say this as someone who spent 7 years at People. Celebrity journalism is a cancer that's eaten the soul of western civilization straight through its asshole. To practice it is let a little of your own soul die each day. Rationalize away, but without the celebrity media, George Clooney would probably still be an actor, as would most people who choose to act (sing, write, direct, etc.). But we'd be rid of an entire class of people who are famous for just being famous. Personally, I don't give a rat's ass about any artist's personal life, because I realize it's none of my fucking business.
i suppose pointing out there's a difference between entertainment reporters and the people clooney is talking about is not really worth the time.
I love George, he totally gets it. He is not a moron, he gets that certain aspects of his life are public property. I'm fairly certain what he objects to are the asshole stalker-azi that have become a plague to movie stars and the world in general. Yeah, I want to know what my favorite star is doing up to a point but fuck, don't they deserve to have lives too????
Go George!!!
Listen I'm not saying that I look like George Clooney but everytime me and my wife make love she yells out his name so there must be a resemblance.
@Mediahohoho: PEOPLE--Making a Business Out of Other People's Business
There's a difference between Gawker and the tabloids, at least to me. Gawkers' stance pokes fun at the world for what it is. Tabloids hire the paparazzis that stalk celebs. Gawker asks people to talk about people they happen to see. And that's fun.
Tabloids cater to people who think celebs lives are their business and talk about them like they know them, and they need to because their lives are boring and uninteresting for the most part. Gawker caters to people who read blogs while they should be working. Gawker readers are better than you.
Not saying Gawker isn't trashy when it wants to be, but I just think they have a good enough sense of humor - and aren't actively hunting down celebs, that they shouldn't be considered tabloid vs satire.
Why is he doing Leatherheads? Probably because he wanted to do a good comedy. It's a safe bet that since The Peacemaker, Clooney's smartened up about his film choices - like you said, Hamilton. I don't think he would've signed up for this football movie if it was going to be another lame, lowbrow Hollywood yuk-yuk offering.
Anyone who will poop in a catbox for a prank is okay with me.
Well as long as it's not at my house.
And I don't actually see it.
Instead of getting all punch like Bjork and Sean Penn, Clooney has opted to register his disapproval of intrusive paps with wit and humor.
Bravo!
@BettyCrocker: Gah! punchy, not punch
@BettyCrocker: I like the punchy ones too.
Saw Leatherheads the other day. Not so much a "smart decision" on Georgie's part.
He hasn't been the same since his pig died.
Uh, he's this close to becoming Ashton Kutcher which isn't as depressing as it sounds, seeing as Clooney doesn't date within his peer group either.
Soon he will dispatch his legion of Clooney clones to various sectors of the rich and famous, instruct them to canoodle with a variety of celebrities (Lauren Bacall on the Riviera, Kristen Dunst in the Meat Packing District, Andy Dick in Duluth) and sit back while the world of the paparazzi implodes.
Why are all these posts so long all of a sudden?
I don't have time for all this readin' stuff.
@In Other News...:
come on folks -- he did "Leatherheads" so he could get jiggy with Renee Zellwegger again. Jeez, talking about hiding in plain sight!
@Hamilton Nolan: That video of Bjork laying waste to the pap in the aiport was delightful.
To hell with Clooney. He's been dead to me since the Charlton Heston incident.
According to the New York Post's Liz Smith, while accepting an award from the National Board of Review, Clooney wisecracked, "Charlton Heston announced again today that he is suffering from Alzheimer's."
When asked about the statement, Clooney told Smith, "I don't care. Charlton Heston is the head of the National Rifle Association. He deserves whatever anyone says about him."
Kicking a man when he's down is bad enough. But kicking a man when he's completely defenseless is unforgivable. Clooney maybe handsome and charming on the outside, but he has genuine cruelty and ugliness on the inside.
I'll never spend a single penny on anything Clooney does.
I'm not sure I see the "problem."
So the idea is, because George Clooney makes money by being photographed, he needs to be willing to "work with" anyone who wants to make money photographing him at any time? Why is that? That logic wouldn't fly in my line of work.
I work in the media, but if I set limits on my participation in it, am I "undermining" it? Why do we treat our own work and lives as something we'd like some modicum of control over and performers as people who've made a devil's bargain with us?
Let him "undermine." Let him do as he likes. It's his life.
Not to mention: Clooney took a situation in which there was nothing to take a photo of, and gave the poor working saps, er, paps, something to take a photo of. He goes along with the joke -- but with a light touch and something for everyone.
That's why he's George Clooney and we're so jealous and demanding of him.
All things considered, I wonder if he uses Brylcreem.
@BettyCrocker: I totally saw Bjork punching someone when you wrote that!
@Ssscorpion: it's april third
@BadUncle: Pomade
@Notyourmother: In the red carpet swan dress?
@Ssscorpion: yeah, that is in bad taste. HILARIOUSLY bad taste!
@TedSez: Word. I can't take him seriously when he dates 28 year old former cocktail waitresses whose dubious claim to fame was being on "Fear Factor." Can't he find, like, a young activist actress at least? Until he does, I'm going to poke fun at him. I'll probably do so after too. I just can't feel bad for celebrities. They need to get in line behind AIDS babies and Iraqi war victims in competition for my sympathy.
@BettyCrocker: Exactly. With her feathers plumped out and her long paddle-ended legs pumping feverishly below the surface...
@Unfun: I hate being in line behind AIDS babies and war victims. They never have their change ready and just gab away on their cell phones.
George Clooney, on the other hand, always has exact change and starts bagging his own groceries as they're being rung up.
I'm just saying.
I for one really respect his work. He definitely deserved the Oscar for those Nespresso commercials.
please leave the peacemaker alone... my brother did some cg on that movie, and in his words, the movie "at least didn't suck"
@Code6Charles:
I saw that "Leatherheads" is a romantic comedy. Then it dawned on me that this flick is basically can't lose financially. All any woman that wants her boyfriend/husband to go watch it with her has to say is "But honey, it's a movie about old-timey football!"
No straight man can resist that.
I'm going to have my people start submitting gawker sightings of me to see if I get famous and make lots of money.
Ten minutes ago I was at Kenmore and Waveland. I don't think anyone even knows where thats at.
@finwar: it did too suck but it also featured this piece of promotional schwag:
which is my favorite thing ever.
"I don't want Fop Pommade, goddamit! I'm a Dapper Dan man!"
Honestly, for that line alone George can do whatever the hell he wants and I will still respect the hell out of him.
@Dave J.: Word.
No way, man. That was hilarious, with the wedding tables. Bring your A game, George!
@Unfun: You do know they're not really dating right? I mean, pretty much everyone in the business knows George likes guys.
@allyzay: Is there a Nicole Kidman version too?
@Dave J.: Seconded.
@In Other News...: not that i remember. if there was, we tossed it and only kept the clooney card.
Hamilton, i think you've left out a huge chapter in this story.
Wasn't it Clooney who organized a celebrity boycott against giving interviews to any of the the TV tabloid shows like "Hard COpy" unless they stopped broadcasting nasty (and probably mostly untrue) shit about them?
People forget, back in the 1990s, all these celeb TV shows used to be rather mean-spirited, trading in unflattering, often ufounded rumors about celebs. The general tone was akin to that of the British tabloids.
With the boycott, Clooney changed all that. He figured, correctly, that if covering celebs was how these shows made all their money, then celebs had the leverage to make them start treating them better. And he was right. The boycott worked, and these shows mostly suck up to the stars now in exchange for access.
At least, that's what I recall. Anywone else remember this?
@Mediahohoho: Since you started out serious, I'll respond to it seriously. That not only do I completely agreed, but that the other casualty of the celebration on fame, the scene and promotion is that the reporting on craft and passion has gotten lost. Look at any music magazine, who have all decided to become "lifestyle" publications to sell ads to clothing, liquor and shoe purveyors -- gone is insightful writing about music and bands replaced by puff pieces that amount to little more that "who are you wearing?" True, some of the journalism has moved to the web -- but what a sad state of affairs when those that had the voice of authority have thrown it away to sell ad space to whatever LVMH property is hot right now.
this is making my head hurt. i cant figure out if clooney is really famous or if he's only famous because someone decided he was famous.
Stop trying to grab my attention by making a big commotion in the press, George Clooney. I know you want me. You won me over year ago. You had me at "Hello Toodie".
Generally speaking, people who are into playing practical jokes are malicious dicks. Isn't Mel Gibson supposedly a big practical joker?
@Spirit Fingers: zing!
Is Ashton Kutcher REALLY that stupid? He married still hawt Demi, turned his 15 mins o' fame into a TV show producing and marketing hit, and didn't he get into college to become a rocket scientist? literally. I think people confuse Kelso with Kutcher.
@Koreanish: I agree. I love a good practical joke. And in the 90's, between takes filming ER, he signed an autograph for me (for my GF who wouldn't cross the police tape to ask). They were filming the scene where he left his wallet in the cab.
What a bunch of bullshit whining! Poor us, Clooney won't throw us a bone! BFD. The man's got a brain and a life, go pick on someone your own size.
Comment on Is George Clooney The Nemesis Of The Tabloid Economy? Love ya, Hamilton, but. this paparazzi wedding table "joke" was staged two years ago! I think starting your thesis with "latest antics" is a bit off? How do I know? Because when I was desperately trying to find out the weather for the day (looking out the window doesn't cut it) I watched his silly interview with Meredith Viera this morning on the Today show, where he told the story of his table-gate in response to Meredith showing pictures of him and Brad Pitt and inquiring about their Bro-Mance (her use, thank you very much). On a side note, while searching for the video of the interview I found it very strange that Access Hollywood is listed under the 'News' tab on the NBC website. -Kristen ------------ Ps. I just registered my email to post this in the comments section, but there was no area to place my "test" comment for your stringent approval process.
@lawyergay: Hmpf! You take that back George could never be in the same catagory as that anti-semitic prick Mel, as if.
@lawyergay: are you one of those gullible types that are easy to prank, then?
@Ssscorpion: Ummm, having a terrible and debilitating disease doesnt make you immune to criticism for the choices you make as a healthy person. Carry on Clooney! You insensitive bastard! Someday when you're old and dying of an std related disease, we'll make fun of you for living with pigs, and from heaven you will chuckle with us and call us a-holes under your breath. And that's how it should be.
@Ssscorpion: good for you man, i admire you're ideals. but good lord if you don't like kicking when they're down, what are you doing reading gawker?