The Top 25 Child Stars -Or- How to Turn Your Kid Into An F'ed-Up Commodity


Some people think that agents, executives and Anthony Pellicano are the most evil people in Hollywood. But watch Vh1's I Know My Kid's a Star for ten minutes and you'll see who the real villains are: Stage parents.

These kid pimps (usually mothers) push their tiny tots into the limelight, despite the tragedies that have befallen so many who came before them. This list of the "Top 25 Child Stars" is more a gallery of sadness than the tribute to talent we all wish it was. Sure, you've got your few who managed not to lose their marbles (Christian Bale, Elijah Wood), but they are few and far between. Out of 25 kid actors, two were married EIGHT times each, four became addicted to coke in their teens (though technically Drew Barrymore was only 12 when she started snorting what she may have actually thought was nose candy), four were married or pregnant by 20, and the rest are just a grab bag of crazy. Heroin addicts and a manic depressive make the list, as does one who was well on her way to normalcy ... until her stalker shot the President.

Not making the list of great child stars? Robert Blake, the Little Rascal who shot his wife. Carl Switzer, the Little Rascal who got shot by his bookie. The whole cast of Diff'rent Strokes.... And, more importantly, all the child actors who never became stars, but lived through all the same traumatic experiences as their more successful counterparts. But don't bother telling this to a mom with dollar signs in her eyes, as Danny Bonaduce tried to recently when he took a busload of bad parents down the Sunset Strip and heartfully told them the painful stories of many young stars. Right after pointing out the spot where River Phoenix OD'd and died as his teenage brother Joaquin watched, Bonaduce says, "Show hands if you still want stardom for your kid, and you think you can handle it for sure." And they all do, without a single moment of hesitation.

Here's the complete list:
25. Kirsten Dunst
24. Lindsay Lohan
23. Sean Astin
22. Keisha Castle-Hughes
21. Natalie Wood
20. Christian Bale
19. Abigail Breslin
18. Elijah Wood
17. Jodie Foster
16. Haylie Mills
15. Freddie Highmore
14. Freddie Bartholomew
13. Anna Paquin
12. Christina Ricci
11. Tatum O'Neal
10. Haley Joel Osment
9. Elizabeth Taylor
8. Patty Duke
7. Jackie Cooper
6. Dakota Fanning
5. Drew Barrymore
4. Mickey Rooney
3. Judy Garland
2. Macaulay Culkin
1. Shirley Temple