Last week, we published the longest rant about hipster kickball in Brooklyn in the history of hipster kickball. It turns out that there's more to the story: BKKB co-founder Kevin Dailey, 38, has written a somehow more outrageous letter. This time it's a list of demands to Williamsburg dive bar Turkey's Nest, the closest bar to McCarren Park. (He was referred to as "Kev" in the previous screed.) Highlights and allegations? "What I make in one week of kickball is less than the margarita machine generates in one hour." Also, "Over those four years, kickball has made the Nest hundreds of thousands of dollars."
About that margarita machine: it's ten bucks for a huge Styrofoam cup of it! We love the Turkey's Nest. What other place has old men, hipsters, and Hasidic Jews watching sports?
If you can't stomach reading through the whole letter, we understand and offer highlights of the demands:
1) A four-year cash bonus
2) Keys to the bar
3) "I'm tired of bullshit from those aforementioned employees. Let them know I am one of them."
4) A laminated drink card granting free drinks, forevermore, for him and his "lady of the evening." Hey!
5) The Turkey's Nest should pay for all kickball-related expenses: "the permits, the equipment, the balls, everything." And a shed: "I'm tired of the softball leagues stealing my shit."
6) Finally, a weekly wage.