Million-Whatever Marches Getting Out Of ControlNot that we have to remind you, but you should be making your preparations now to attend the August 30 "Million DJ March" in Washington, DC. One million DJs—a number equal to almost all of the DJs in Williamsburg—will "descend on Washington to celebrate decades of service to the entertainment industry." And what worthier cause could there be?

"DJs are the least compensated in the industry element...I am calling on the industry to show support of an event to unify DJs and create future economic safety for these people. The Million DJ March will be the conclusion to a long road of requests from many markets to aid in our mission of security."

Who knew that DJs were so threatened? Louis Farrakhan, who started this whole phenomenon with his Million Man March—the one that actually drew a million people—must be so proud to see what his idea has become: a bitch session for scratchmasters.

Anything less than 1,000,000 DJs will bring the cause crashing down like a pair of Technics perched on a shaky table, so register now.