From the Nerve.com blogger, a New York gentleman who calls himself "Zeitgeisty": "Last night I went on another date with that chick I met at Dunkin Donuts, the one I thought was a bit skinny.. Well, this time around I felt a bit more 'plugged - in', and we both 'enjoyed the fried calamari' so to speak." So many things going wrong here, but... no, dude, we do not know what you meant by "enjoyed the fried calamari." Well, we sort of do, but... Dunkin' Donuts chick—e-mail us and elaborate?













Comments
They went to a club, met an octopus that was high on coke, took him home and had a three-way with him. Dude's hair is a dead giveaway.
Wow. Wow. Wowee wow wow.
Grossed out face emoticon.
"Cross me, and I will art you to death."
Perhaps "fried calamari" means they both need a douche.
They all lie in their blogs.
Also, there's one thing I can think of that is sexual and could be compared to calamari...it starts with an "h".
Not as "Zeitgeisty" as he's advertising, now is he?
Raw calamari is more enjoyable than fried - nudge nudge wink wink.
That's funny, because my wife and I went on a date last night and we both enjoyed the penis and vagina, so to speak.
But when she saw your linguine I bet that was the end of the evening.
@HamptonShmampton: How is horse-rimming like calamari?
All this clown's blog is making me horny for is fried food.
Anal. Fried calamari looks like buttholes.
He looks like fried calamari.
@mindbling: I thought that was called the RJ.
Adrien Brody and his 3 inch shoulders do not impress me.
@CopyofBlueboy: Well, you are what you eat.
@mindbling: Thanks! I was hoping it was something that wouldn't turn me off to calamari in the future.
Gay 70s Adrian Brody?
Is that who we're paying attention to now?
@moff: was it mutual rimming?? with cocktail sauce-so to speak...
I was thinking of something else...more of a temporary situation.
I also put out for fried foods.
@HamptonShmampton: There's nothing else sexual that starts with h.
And horse-rimming is always mutual -- or else, watch out!!! You're gonna get your kicks in a big way, buddy!!!
@collegecallgirl: Say, I know where they have the best onion loaf in NYC.
@collegecallgirl: You do too? Let's be friends.
I think it really means that they both enjoyed the fried calamari appetizer and then she refused to go home with him.
When that guy asks if you'd "like to see his record collection." Its a good idea to politely decline.
@moff: handjob? That does not resemble calamari though. One would hope.
@Clare: Say, I know where they have the best onion loaf in NYC.
@Koreanish: Yes. I am chicken soup, chocolate cake, and pride.
I'm excited for my date tomorrow. We're going to "meet at the Porter T stop" and then "share the vegetable pakora" and then "pay the bill," if you know what I mean, heh heh heh.
@Unfun: OK, fine, handjob. But c'mon -- who thinks of handjob before horse-rimming?
And yes, one would hope. Yikes.
@moff: @Clare: For a sampler platter containing but not limited to jalapeno poppers, chicken fingers, and mozarella strips, I do anal. Twice.
@moff: I guess you've never had a virgin?
@Unfun: When I was little, I saw a cartoon in Penthouse of a guy and girl sitting on a couch, and the girl had one of the guy's hands entirely in her mouth. And the caption was:
"I really appreciate it, sweetie, but this wasn't what I had in mind when I asked for a handjob."
It was about five more years before I understood that cartoon.
i wouldn't even want him in my kickball team let alone my "calamari"
Like anyone really needed still more reason to stay the hell away from the Nerve personals.
@mindbling: That makes me not want calamari. Blech.
@moff: I was unaware of the term horse-rimming. The act itself...sure, but not the horse part.
@Don Is:
You both enjoyed the penis and vagina?
I hate to be service-y, but I think it's just a reference to one of his earlier posts, in which he wrote about how on a date you never know what the person on the other side of the appetizer is thinking.
But please, back to the innuendo. Rimming FTW!
@moff: You read that cartoon at 22?
As heinous as "anal calamari" already sounds, it would be his insistence on showing me his "anal etchings" that would have me out of there, um... lickety split.
@HamptonShmampton: I don't know. It's really hard to ask a horse about her sexual history. They're super-sensitive.
I'll up his fried calamari one giant Sperm Whale.
Thar she blows!
Wait, how can you meet someone at a Dunkin' Donuts who is "a bit skinny"?
@TheHonJudgeSmails: I have a mom-related riposte, but it's really not enough to win this round. DAMMIT.
@moff: I mean, ask them anything, and all they say is, "Neigh."
@collegecallgirl: What are your thoughts on this?
[gawker.com]
The truly sad thing is, I needed a visual of calamari to understand this. And now I have a lot of questions for this lady.
Watch out for that lemon wedge next to the fried calamari, though. Lemon juice stings. (Don't ask how I know...)
I got food poisoning in 2006 from fried calamari.
Oh! I understand it now...
But why is it fried? Does that mean it's dirty?
"She told me that when she first saw me she was struck, as I was her 'perfect type'. It's interesting how much smoother things go when you're someone's 'perfect type'.. You can relax, because you know they're not craning their necks to look for the next one down the line."
Until they find out you posted about enjoying the fried calamari on your blog and it ended up on Gawker.
@NYM: Is "food poisoning" code for "herpes"? You can tell me.
@HamptonShmampton: google "Enumclaw, WA" and "horse" together.
@collegecallgirl: What are your feelings on tempura or an oil fondu?
OMG! I wrote for the Blog-a-Log until a month ago, and never in the past year and a half did Gawker link to us...I am simultaneously happy, yet deeply sad.
@4Cats: yes, it's dirty, nasty, depraved, and cooked in oil
@Sara Benincasa: I would be more happy, because, y'know, the best way to make it onto Gawker is to write or do something egregiously retarded.
aomg - I'm so freaked out I cannot even type aomg. hee hee hee.
I need to look at pictures of cute puppies stat!1!!
I think what he means it, there was sexual catharsis. Maybe?
cocktail sauce breath really isn't that appealing though.
@valarmorghulis: OH. MY. GOD.
@moff: If that's something you're into, surely you've heard of this, then.
[laughlines.blogs.nytimes.com]