A few days yore, as I was sifting through the excrement of Fleet ditch the comments, an epiph'ny struck my pate. I, your faithful executioner, have fail'd you. I negleckted to explain the diff'rence betwixt a comment that pleases me, and a comment that makes me wonder if maybe I should give Buzz Bissinger a weapon and your home address. Prithee accept mine apology for such noisome oversight. After the jump, I shall present a full explanation for why you may be executed.

Because I feel like it.

And now, this week's condemned.

Executed: Hez
Because I feel like it.

Executed: Unfun
Because I feel like it.

Executed: McCheeburger
Because I feel like it.

Executed: Digitalsmoothie
Because I feel like it.

Executed: BinkysDream
Because he's a brummy twit. And because I feel like it.

You have all raised my choler. Be less annoying next week. As always, condemnations, bribes, and pleas for mercy may be sent to GawkerExecutioner@gmail.com. Don't email Denton, Pareene, Richard, Sheila, Hamilton, Nick Douglas, Ryan or anyone else from the Court of Gawker. I'm not them, and they don't care. I actually don't either, but whatever

The author of this post can be contacted at tips@gawker.com