Gawker
Frivolous backstabbing egocentric money media war! The protagonists: Tim Sykes (pictured), who made a big name for himself as an under-30 hot shot hedge fund guy by starring in a reality show called Wall Street Warriors, and then proceeded to lose lots of his money and try to remake himself as a media figure; and Randall Lane, the former editor of odious greed magazine Trader Monthly and current head of Doubledown Media, who recently lost a gig publishing Players Club magazine after a financial dispute. Lane disinvited Sykes from a Trader Monthly party last year, and the young capitalist is still nursing his wounded ego! Now Sykes has taken to the internet to tell Lane—a "Sick Twisted Son Of A Bitch"—boo-yah, loser!:
Last time Randall Lane, editor-in-chief of Traitor Monthly was in Page Six, he was attacking a small-time trader (me) because his magazine staff fumbled, disinviting me from their little party at the last minute after we'd been discussing my covering the event for MSN Money for days.Clearly in the wrong, this balding bastard was forced to go on the offensive, charging my hedge fund's losses were the result of my publicity hounding rather than bothering to research the matter like a responsible journalist might do.
Sykes asks: how do you like hard times, you balding bastard?
So Randy, I know times are tough for you right now—no doubt bringing back memories of when your first magazine, P.O.V., went out of business—but unlike you I'm willing to give second chances to those who make mistakes. After all, we're only human. If you can show some remorse for your actions, I'll consider taking you on at my publishing company, BullShip Press, LLC—as an unpaid intern of course—and under my guidance, I think we'll be able to put you on a more righteous path—no promises, there's a whole lotta work to be done, but if you're willing to change, I'm willing to help you get better.
Comments
Before long they'll be going head to head as spokesmen for Massengill and Summer's Eve.
Parker Lewis. Funny.
Dear Tim,
I understand that you're interested in getting back into the world of investing! Great! If you'd like to quit all of this self-aggrandizing crap and do some real work, I'd be happy to take you on - as an unpaid intern, of course - and teach you how to not completely fuck over your clients, investors, and everyone else in a 30-mile radius. No promises; you have to get past your reputation as the biggest loser wannabe on the Street, but if you're willing to change
Oh screw it, like you even care if you're inept and despised.
Love,
Dis
Later that evening Sykes took a good long look in his bathroom mirror and cried. "This is such a sham. I'm so empty. EMPTY!"
That's a lotta bull.
They should just go to the playground and pee on each other.
I could never invest with a man who fails to tuck in button-down shirts 100% of the time.
@richardmarxhatesmyhair: I'd buy a ticket to that.
@ADismalScience: thank you. someone HAD to say all that. kids who make a name for themselves quickly usually end up like this. They think they're the next Cramer but unfortunately for them [and fortunately for us] there can only be so many bad investors screaming at us via the television at a time.
1. Only on Gawker and Page Six can a 35% loss be turned into "losing everything"
2. I owned half my hedge fund, nobody lost more than me. Tough but necessary lessons.
3. Thanks to earlier gains when I was the top ranked fund 2003-2006, most of my investors ended up breakeven
4. I understand I'm immature, I'm young. Randall is not, he should know better.
5. The losses have made me infinitely wiser and more conservative--and those lessons are directly responsible for my earning 50% on my money since November 2007, returning to being a top performer.
I encourage everyone here to be better than Randall Lane and do a little digging before jumping to conclusions
@TimothySykes: Please just answer TheHonJudgeSmails about the not tucking in your shirt thing. That's all that really matters here.
I usually wear a robe to work, I don't need to tuck anything in...suites and ties are corporate drone prison garb IMHO
@TimothySykes: Tuck your fucking shirt in.
@TheHonJudgeSmails:But he doesn't wear a shirt! He wears a robe because in his humble opinion he is Hugh Hefner!
@TheHonJudgeSmails: Did you know Gawker has a new News Feed-y service? It just told me that you are now following a certain someone ... creepy! (of Gawker, not you. Well, OK maybe you too.)
@IndianSlipper: Yes, after all those years spent nose-to-the-grindstone, steadily working his way up to the top, he deserves to wear a robe to work.
You're an embarrassment to our generation, Tim.
@Phyllis Nefler: I just want to watch and see if he grows up, and learns to tuck his fucking shirt in.
Nah I'm no Hefner, I'm small-time, I wear a robe cuz it's comfortable. Since I'm done taking on outside investors, I don't have to dress up for nobody!
@TimothySykes: I like a good business suite myself. The honeymoon suite is too extravagant.
@TheHonJudgeSmails: When I was in Catholic school, there was a nun who would sneak up behind us in the hallways if our oxfords weren't tucked into our plaid skirts (just giving some visuals) and tuck them in for us.
Time heals many wounds, but not the emotional ones caused by the recollection of bony nun fingers down your skirt.
Not like you need (or want) my respect, but I will reconsider my opinion of you if you tell us you are in some small way, somehow related to Wanda Sykes.
'Cause that'd be pretty sweet.
@Phyllis Nefler: Remove the nun, add some early breast/hip development, add the long socks, and continue.
@3:40 I'm an embarrassment to our generation? You gotta be kidding me, I've been working 16-20 hour days for nearly a decade, turning my small Bar Mitzvah gift money into a small fortune, losing 1/3 of it yes, but in this game nobody is perfect.
I work in a robe cuz I'm real--not some fancy-talking greased-back-hair-leverage-loving-coke-and-hooker-abusing-corporate-drone that's the norm on Wall Street. I am my own boss and I've worked hard so it'll always be that way. (I never use leverage and risk disaster, 35% losses are just about the worst it'll EVER get for me)
On the contrary, my financial speculation, entrepreneurship and brutal honesty represent everything on which our country was founded. Apparently, my big mouth has pissed a few people off, but so what? On my website [www.timothysykes.com] I'm blogging every day, detailing all my stock trades (while earning a 50% return in the last 6 months) and answering ALL questions fro all sorts of people in order to cut through all the industry BS and misinformation that's made society look down on this once great profession.
For shame! Forget about being a Cramer wannabe, I am Cramer 2.0, you ain't seen nothing yet!
@TimothySykes: You can't do that! "Outside investors" are CLAMORING for you to find those massive returns! They need your experienced hand to steer them through these turbulent economic times. YOU CAN'T DO THIS!!!
Who will Buffett turn to?
@TimothySykes: If by Cramer 2.0 you mean a snake-oil selling, faulty tip-shilling, unaccountable, screaming head, then I encourage you to aim higher.
Forget about investors--as you'll learn my strategy ain't scalable. That's half the reason I couldn't grow my hedge fund.
But that doesn't mean it' not IDEAL for smaller investors/traders--as readers to my site have learned (over the past few days more than a dozen have posted about making more than $1,000 each off my picks and theories). That's right, forget about BS stock picks, I'm teaching the process too!
And whats faulty about a 50% return since November--all the while making plenty of mistakes, detailing them all. PS All trades are verified by Covestor, where I'm one of the top ranked investors ([www.covestor.com])
C'mon haters, you gotta do better than this, I've got nothing to hide so I'll take you all on! What's more since I'm not in the finance industry anymore--I'm in publishing--I'm free of the absurd SEC regulations and cuz I've got plenty of money and a nice income now too, I can literally say whatever the hell I want. You can choose not to listen--many will--but in time, you'll see what I say is profitable, and until you find another brutally honest loudmouth who doesn't care what people think and is willing to share ALL his knowledge and experience that led him to make 150x his money without any training or discipline, I've got this niche cornered!
Tim
[www.timothysykes.com]
@TimothySykes: What's your website address again?
@TheHonJudgeSmails: It was chilly that day as I stood shivering at the bus stop, and I could feel my budding, nubile breas...
You must be a subscriber to continue.
@TimothySykes: "absurd SEC regulations"
--Click--
@fiveinchtaint: Yes, what was it? Know who I miss?
abbe diaz
PX this
www.pxthis.com
@ TheHonJudgeSmails: Cramer tucks his shirts in. Maybe that's what he ment.
@Phyllis Nefler: Do you accept PayPal?
[www.timothysykes.com] is the website and yes my training DVD are bought on PayPal. you probly need them
and if you don't think MANY of the SEC's regulations are absurd, then you'll become one of my greatest readers...looking forward to opening your eyes!
@TimothySykes: Why didn't you defend yourself here last year?
[gawker.com]
@TimothySykes: "When I invested that first nickel, it was really like a dime. And when that quarter became my first dolar, I could have run out and spent the 5 dollars. But instead, re-invested the 10 dollars. But I never let my hundred-aire status go to my head."
One more time, How exactly does 6 months of a 50% return on investment equate to 150x the money?
Cuz I was still in the finance industry, hence unable to respond, hence one of the best examples of an absurd SEC regulation
Hey, I know this great girl, also in publishing, who you should meet. Stakes her rep on her individuality as well (ref.- "coporate drones"). She loves the rich, somewhat geeky type, however, so you'll have to upgrade one category, and kind of lower the bar in the other. Oh, and if you don't mind TOO much, she will air video of all of your aguments on her website. Let me see if I can find her email address at the magazine she edits... or her blog... But you have to promise to invite us to the wedding. Promise?
Ah. Well, good luck to you. You should remember though that the "I can say anything now" may not apply at some point in your future. And what you blog now will be here ten years from now for everyone to see.
Advice from an old one who is damn glad the internet wasn't in full swing in my early twenties.
@TimothySykes: You quite the finance industry so you could respond to online comments about you? That's just silly.
4:16: Follow along on the fun timeline that is my life:
1999-2002 Turn $12k into $1.65 mil in my dorm room, in a robe, thanks to all the ignorance surrounding penny stocks
2003-2004 Make another $250k (now 150x my 1999 investment) again thanks to penny stocks and now short selling--or betting against them--but can't talk about it cuz now I'm a hedge fund manager (SEC absurd rule #24247), start trying on suits
2003-2006: #1 Ranked Short Bias Hedge Fund Manager Make a few hundred grand more, Still can't talk specifics, Now Wearing suits
2006: TV show becomes a hit, shows mme wearing suits and robes
2007: An illiquid investment I made back in 2004 blows up, no chance of me getting out, fund loses 35%, everyone--like Randall Lane--assumes my publicity is the cause that has hurt my trading
2008: Close hedge fund, create blog & publishing company dedicated to cutting through all the BS and assumptions, aiming to teach people to profit for industry corruption and BS, whether they wear robes or suits.
@TVAddendum: Brilliant!
@TimothySykes: 2009 - CUNY Hunter for remedial English Composition courses.
@TheHonJudgeSmails: Sorry Spitzer, cash only.
@valarmorghulis: Listen, learn the difference between "quit" and "quite" or I'll beat the hell out of you.
I don't have to waste time on my grammar or typing, I'm a friggin stock trader! All I gotta do is help people learn to profit form my strategies rather than be content to take random BS stock picks all the time.
But even if I wasn't helpful, I still wouldn't bother editing--this is Gawker for gods sake!
@TimothySykes:
You got lucky, stopped being lucky, and now you're going to pretend you knew what you were doing.
It's not uncommon, but the reason you're out of it isn't because you've identified media as some wonderful opportunity. It's because you were always too volatile, it finally caught up, and now your own mother wouldn't buy an index from Vanguard on your recommendation. You're out because your investors lost all confidence in your ability to make intelligent investment decisions and demanded redemptions.
Just to keep the story straight
"...all from my 1-bedroom apartment!"
Ok...which one of you are pretending to be this Timothy Sykes guy? Cuz no one REALLY would be this big a tool.
I'm not sure why, but with every Timothy Sykes post I read, the name 'John Fitzgerald Page' keeps popping into my head.
I think the representation that he made 150x his original investment as a current fact then in the timeline recants said theory speaks volumes.
However, I am a little impressed with Tim's ability to keep a positive attitude with all this bashing going on. I think he could totally handle she-who-shall-not-be-named, especially with his ability to string-together-long-descriptive-sentences-with-dashes-all-while-portraying-investment-managers-as-the-stereotype-they-haven't-embodied-since-the-80s-unless-you-base-your-assumptions-on-boiler-room.
Date JA, keep making money and talk to me when you have an overall positive track record for over 10 years. Until then you're just another trader who has a big mouth, a minimal record of success and a serious desire to be respected.
@4:41 Lots of people who don't take the time to research the facts do believe that. Unfortunately for you, my only loss occurred when I got away from my core strategy.
Now that I'm back to core strategy--disciplined ore than ever--I'm up 50% in 6 months, even while writing, promoting and doing a ton of other stuff that takes away form my trading.
Don't believe me--good! You can check on my website every day and in time, you'll see what I'm doing is not random, nor is it luck, its the single best niche trading strategy for small accounts. I encourage you to purchase my 6 hour DVD, it will explain everything and you might learn a thing or two and apologize for making such Randall Lane-esque assumptions
5:03 I base my stereotypes on the people I've met and dealt with, they're alive and well and I want nothing to do with them. Now I'm just a stock blogger, open to all compliments and criticism
@TimothySykes:
If you were a trader worth your weight in salt, let alone gold, you would know that being up 50% in a 6month window means NOTHING. NO ONE intelligent invests short-term and expects it to hold. Eventually you get caught with your pants down. Listen, seriously... come back in 10 years when you [and the market] have had time correct... until then, it's just not a worth-while investment history. It's so up and down and short-sighted. I agree with some of what you say but think you have lost sight of the big picture and when that happens... disaster is often around the corner.
and don't ever aim to be Cramer_.0 anything... you can do better.
@DorothyMantooth: Cossman looks like a 1950s arnold governator.
did he own a boat called Positive Carry?
50% in 6 months is just the start...I usually take y gains every day, it's not investing its trading...this is kind of misinformation out there. small gains, day by day, month by month, thats how i turned thousands into milions the first time, thats how ill do it again
"I don't have to waste time on my grammar or typing, I'm a friggin stock trader! "
Why oh why don't you offer custom T-Shirts, like CNN? Why?
Also, just because you don't wear the suit doesn't mean you outgrew the stereotype.
@TimothySykes: well best of luck to you... I guess I'm just old-fashioned or something but to me an "investment" is better than trading any day and will build wealth as long as you make the right investments [the same goes for trading] and trading just is not as long term or sustainable unless you want to put in 20 hour days for the rest of your life. robe vs. suit means very little then. again, good luck and keep us posted on all your success!