Gawker
Soldiers are fighting back against a government attempt to take their men's magazines away! Stars and Stripes talked to a bunch of our military men at a base in Germany, and they voiced universal opposition to a proposed bill to ban "sexually explicit" magazines—including Playboy, Penthouse, Maxim, FHM, and the like—from Army bases. They're good for morale, the soldiers say. And besides (everybody together now), they read them for the articles!
"We all read 'em," said Pfc. Paul Rubio, 31, of Bakersfield, Calif. "There are times we just read 'em for the technological parts like the new gadgets that come out. They have good stories sometimes too."Sgt. Simon Brown, 34, of Daytona Beach, Fla., said men's magazines build morale. "It's not all about the pictures, although 80 percent of it is," he said.
Pfc. Greg Smith, 21, of Northboro, Mass., a regular Playboy reader, said soldiers should be allowed to buy nudie magazines at the exchange.
"Playboy is good entertainment while you are on the can. They have jokes and good stories," he said...
"It would suck if they ban it," he said. "It's bad enough we are down there to begin with. Taking that away would be like a knife in the chest. I'm not saying I'm depending on Maxim to keep me alive over there, but it helps."
[Military.com via Dan Savage]
Comments
The whole idea of banning pornography among the military is preposterous. These poor guys. Bless them - their government so rarely has their best interests at heart.
I guess if you ask them why they like Maxim and they say because of the articles, that sort of skirts the whole "don't ask don't tell" issue.
Jesus H Fucking Christian Values Nutjobs! First, it's "don't ask, don't tell" and now they want to take away their hetero porn?
Porn has gotten the boys in the foxhole through shitty days since the invention of war and porn!
Can we get this guy out of the White House already?
I'm actually all for this provided that the bill also requires castration to hold office.
"If I'm gonna die for a word, then my word is poontang."
Those articles in the picture are barely covered.
Wow, way to go military personnel for finding a way to further discourage enlistment...
So in Transformers, didn't Megan Fox play a high school student? And during that part where she's looking under the hood of Shia LeBOOFS car, and the camera was ogling her, were we, um, older gents supposed to be ogling along?
This reminds me I have to change my fucking avatar. Fuckin A this has me hot and bothered.
@Knucklehead Babylon: Star for that!
I want to read a quote from Priam, but it seems to me that one of the missions in Iraq and Afgphanistan is to prevent a theocratic style of government from taking over. Which is yet another reason that at least the Iraq force needs to be redeployed stateside.
I'd like to request that my tax dollars be spent on flying Hooters girls overseas to give blow jobs to service men.
@In Other News...: If it makes you feel any better, Megan Fox is 22. If it makes you feel any worse, she's engaged to Brian Austin Green, whose name is "tattooed near her genital region."
Playboy--the other discharge papers..
Of course, these are the same chuckleheads who refuse to get behind the new GI bill because offering a good educational package to soldiers risking their lives in combat might give them an incentive to not re-enlist.
@In Other News...: Every time that scene comes on, my teevee creates a temporal warp that takes me back a decade so that it is socially accecptable to oogle her jiggly bits. At least, that's what the salesmen at Best Buy told me when I bought it.
Playboy-the other discharge papers..
Make porn, not war.
@TedSez: Are you sure it's not just her initials and that it's not just an invitation?
@TedSez: Talk about a man marking his territory, sheesh.
I can't wait until the Republican Congressman who proposed this is inevitably found out to be a homosexual pedophile.
@Mediahohoho: Der...his initials.
@TedSez: That'll be sad when they break up and she has to have it altered to read "BAG Lady Forever".
@Mediahohoho: Yeah, and don't get me started on the treatment in the VA's. I'm giving myself a few hour time out.
@Mediahohoho: To "Make Friends"?
dont ask. don't tell. ...don't read
@Pithmaster:
From seed to shining seed.
@TedSez: Re: 22 - Whew! Re: Brian Austin Green - Ew!
This would be a catastrophe. How will our don't ask don't tell boys be able to throw the homo hunters off the trail without leaving copies of Playboy or Penthouse lying out on their exquisitely made bunks?
i love your hair. do you know debbie?
Damn guvment.
You can be a jerk-off and shoot people, but you can't jerk-off and shoot blanks?
@Colonel Mustard: Or CATBAG (do you think she's a Tionna fan?)
@LoveHandles:
Completely agree!
I also wouldn't be surprised if it allows gay porn to be sold.
That's courtesy of all the closeted, gay Republitards in Congress, which is all of them.
@TedSez: Her catbag is actually labeled "BAG"? ::Shudder::
@Mary Mouse: Jinx! Buy me a coke. (Or an eight ball.)
@Mary Mouse: That would actually be hilarious. Like finding a shirt with "SHIRT" written inside the collar in a black sharpie.
This is bullshit. Which senator is going to write the competing bill to support the troops right to masturbate copiously to (quasi)nudie mags? Who will come to our troops defense?
I'm starting a collection from commenters. It this (God forbid) goes through, I think we should hire Tara Reid to head overseas and service our troops. Who's with me?
@Colonel Mustard: For the last time, stop going through my wardrobe.
@sassypants: Why do you hate our military personnel?
Also, enforce subscriptions for Good Housekeeping so the lady soldiers can enhance their domestic touch for serving Iraqis freedom.
They show pilots porn just before they send them off on bombing missions. Apparently it heightens their concentration ability or something.
@sassypants: I'm pretty sure she's already done that.
@Hez: I don't know what Indian Slipper is getting so hot and bothered over; we all know you have nicer boobs than her anyway.
Banning Penthouse probably doesn't bother Matt Sanchez at all.
The gland of the free.
@Mary Mouse: And Hez knows I luvs hers too! (Damnit Hez I owe you a gift though I never used the pic as my avatar. I'll find one soon)
This is just crazy! Didn't they learn from what happened when they took the girls away from Catholicism?
@Mary Mouse: Thank you, darling. Mine also haven't been slobbered on by David Silver.
@fiveinchtaint: And the Sky Mall catalog for all the Air Force guys!
...no?
@Hez: Oddly enough this fact kinda turns me on.
Without these magazines they might resort to raping their female coworkers and having government contractors bring in hookers. Oh wait...
They should ban FHM, since it stopped publishing a US print edition in 2006. The issues floating around Iraq must be 1) old 2) sticky 3) British.
@TedSez: She's also had hella surgery and been airbrushed within an inch of her life. So even SHE doesn't look like that.
Is "morale" code for "erections"? I think it is.
Isn't the point of the ban because they are in an Islamic country? You know, if you invade someone else's country you really should have the decency to respect some of their beliefs.
I'll give you my June, 1994 copy of "Juggs" when you take it from my cold, dead hands!!!
@valarmorghulis: However, my 90210s have been ogled by Brandon Walsh and enjoyed a cocktail with Donna Martin.
@secretagentman: No, they want to ban it from being sold at PX stores outside of muslim countries. Because apparently respecting the first amendment is something these retards cannot get their fucking heads around. It has absolutely fuckall to do with what they can and cannot bring on deployment.