Gawker
Celebrity lesbian scandal! Are those hickeys on Sapphic DJ Samantha Ronson's neck? And were they given to her by her musty old best friend, actress Lindsay Lohan? The pair, joined at the hip of late, was in Paris over the weekend, and close up photos like the one above have, of course, surfaced and people are, of course, in some sort of tizzy. The real thing to note about this, though, is how "meh" the whole Lohan camp has played it through all this speculation.
During the whole "Lindsay Ronson" Facebook reveal and the earlier "Get...away from my girlfriend" brouhaha, the freckled scarecrow never really made a peep, to deny or otherwise. Unlike her male counterparts, like former boybander JC Chasez and his possible roommate/lover Chace Crawford (from Gossip Girl, natch), who doth protest too much, it's (can't believe I'm going to say this) almost admirable that Lohan has chosen to take the high road on this one. Of course, she could just be a crazy person who doesn't have any sense of how to handle her PR and her career (this is very, very likely). Or! She's an almost-cool "eh, fuck it" lesbian-type. That would be a fun development in the mostly tired Lohan saga, no?
Image from Splash.
Comments
Why would they want her on their team?
Why is Chace Crawford the gay one? Can it be Penn Badgley? I know you're in touch with them by now Richard, what can you do about this?
Meanwhile, Lohan makes a cute lesbian. That's all.
@EpponneeRae: I agree, she seems more lovable as a les.
She makes a better lesbian than actress. Except for "The Parent Trap." She was great in "The Parent Trap."
Rule of Modern Reporting #1: when someone has a hickey and there is another person standing next to them, said person 1 got said hickey from said person 2. and.... PRINT!
I hope Ronson is up to date with her vaccinations.
Or, she's completely irredeemable and largely unemployable at this point, and scandal is the only currency she's really got left (apart from the promise of forthcoming nudity).
Lohan should be a lesbian. In the past, whenever I've been one, I've gotten very serious, and she could do with a little seriousness in her life.
Looks like Gatorade just found a new spokesperson.
I wonder if she's the Michelle Rodriguez type. I'm going to say it, and I don't care: that'd be hot.
It may or may not be admirable, but it's a whole different dealio than it would be for a male star. For someone like Lindsay, being known as kinda/maybe/partly/occasionally into chicks would probably help her career.
has anyone taken the lohan lips and superimposed it over the hickey to see if there is a match? someone should drop their CSI shit and get on that.
"Freckled Scarecrow" is the name of my new band.
It's a jazz-funk-lesbian fusion thing.
Well, it's pretty obvious who wears the coke-pants in that relationship.
@VirusWithShoes: Yeah, 'cuz rabies drool would probably screw up her soundboard.
Honestly? Speaking for all lezebelles everywhere (obvs.), we'll take her. She just makes more sense as one of us.
@fiveinchtaint: I'm glad you don't care. It is.
I think she just ran out of guys.
@VirusWithShoes:
It should be the name of a pub, really.
Are we sure it wasn't Jody Foster who gave said hickey?
@L-dizzle: could it be that the stress of self identifying is what unhinged her some, and that if she accepts who she is and maybe even comes out, she'll be better?
She just needs a tender, loving man such as myself. I will make her chicken soup, massage her corns, cut her lines. Then, and only then, will I hit that.
@fiveinchtaint: Does that mean "Michelle Rodriguez's type"? 'Cause, like, you think the 2 of them together would be hot? Or something else?
Hey Richard? Do you have to capitalize the word "sapphic"? If a proper name becomes an eponymous adjective (that's what you call those, right?), does that adjective retain it capital letter?
I mean, do you call joycean studies Joycean studies?
Forget the hickey - is that dude's ear trying to suck Lindsay into its cochlea?
@L-dizzle: But we'd like to give back Tila Tequila, Cordelia, and Adrianne Curry please. Hell, I'll even throw in a Natalie Portman. We're keeping ScarJo. Thanks.
@fiveinchtaint: I mean, you're not just using "Michelle Rodriguez type" as a synonym for "lesbian," right?
Given the lengths she'll go to sleep with British dudes (she sent Russell Brand a cat, supposedly. "Here's a pussy, now take my pussy") maybe this is all an elaborate plan to get into Mark Ronson's shiny Burberry Prorsum pants.
@Pope John Peeps II: My blergin' software does not accept "sapphic," only Sapphic. It may be wrong.
But, for the record, I would say "Joycean," as I would say "Chekhovian."
@Pope John Peeps II: I believe it is capitalized because it is a title.
In the same way Pedantic Commenter is capitalized as your title.
(Ha!)
They could form a lesbian anarchist collective and call it Sappho and Vanzetti.
@DorothyMantooth: I'm a dude, Mantooth. Keep it simple. I'd like to see what would happen if the two of them were trapped in a room with a strap-on.
@hypocriteoath: HeLLO! They are in PARIS? City of ROMANCE??? Girls don't go to Paris except to give each other lesbian hickeys! Didn't you see the season premiere of The Hills?
@Richard: ... and Conciliatory Reporter Richard.
@Pope John Peeps II: "Sapphic" is a trademark of Sappho Enterprises, Inc., 271 Dionysus Street, Athens, Greece GR 17461.
She might not care about it, but I do remember reading somewhere people close to her doing some form of spin control like "Lindsay is confused, doesn't know what she wants" "She's not really in love" etc
@semiserious: Bitch better stay away from Mark Ronson or I will cut her and she will have to eat her food through a tube.
@Sarcastro: Zing!
@fiveinchtaint: Booo! I was hoping that my giving you the benefit of the doubt for extra cleverness wasn't going to be for naught. Alas.
@In Other News...: I enjoy playing with words and appreciate your recognition of the humor therein.
Now I get to interview a microbiologist. That will be less fun.
@DorothyMantooth: Cleverness. Got it. OK, the room they are trapped in has no doors or windows. In this room is a mirror, a chair, a saw and a strap-on. How do they get out?
@brechtgirl: That's just Dina panicking. If you pull her string she says
"It's just a phase".
"Girls will be girls".
"It's just a little meth".
"Now that's just a lie".
"Just sign the check honey".
@fiveinchtaint: Aaaaaand now I'm gonna bring this conversation back to my usual level and respond that "out" is the wrong preposition there.
Hi-o!
@Richard: That was a polite answer, I must say.
Now, if it were me, I'd be inclined to say, "Hold on a sec while I look up the correct answer in my Manual Of Who Gives A Shit."
@L-dizzle: Hey,I'm the lesbian who speaks on behalf of all the lesbians. But yes: We'll happily take her.
@DorothyMantooth: Ha! You win.
Great. Now Ronson, too, is doomed to be a scary creature of the night — at least until someone puts a stake through her heart.
@MisterHippity:
And then everyone would have gone Ooooooooh...
@Sarcastro: and they'd need a band ...
@Sarcastro: First question: "Amoeba. How do you feel about them? Single-celled bastards, them and their stupid cilia!"
@fiveinchtaint: Thanks! I was channeling my inner Smails!