DING-DONG! DONG-DING! The rainbow-colored smoke has emerged from the chimney atop the California Supreme Court. The Court bells, each recently adorned with a giant portrait of Dave Beckham and Posh Spice, are sounding. For it's official! Same-sex couples in our glorious, seaside state have the right to be wed! We know you have questions, so we went directly to the Defamer special correspondent on Legal Fine Print Accompanying Totally Fabulous Rulings to answer them:
Defamer: So what does this mean?
Correspondent: Gay men and women, as of 30 minutes ago, may now get married in california, with NO restrictions.
Defamer: When might that change?
Correspondent: If the Supreme Court of the United States overturns this.
Defamer: What are the chances of that happening?
Correspondent: This is unlikely to happen as it's a state issue, i.e., there's nothing in the state or U.S. constitution prohibiting gay marriage, so you'd have to get an amendment to one of those. That will in most likelihood not happen. It takes a tremendous amount of effort to ratify an amendment.
Defamer: Yay! Will you marry us?
Defamer: Sad face.
Correspondent: But you can marry anyone you like now—man, or woman.
Defamer: Happy face!