Take a look at the ass that you're missing, 18-34 year old new media denizens!

Morning Wouldn't

Richard, we like it early!

"I'm Going for Extra Slippery, Fellahs!"

Does she look 30 in this picture?

And Soon, the Photographers Got Her to Face the Backdrop Completely.

@Itsjustcatnip: She kinda looks like a young-ish Edie Falco here, so yes.

"This Is My Favorite Part of 'Newsweek'!"

"Say It With Me, Fellahs - The 'CWAH'!"

Pop Culture Repository's Human Suppository

"...And This Is How I Got Pregnant."

[belching] ". . . W, X, Y and Z . . ."

New Rule for Fall: Wear Spun Gold While Spinning Crap

"Save the Coral Weefs!"

To me this says Blanche from Golden Girls.

I thought it was Sharon Stone...

I killed someone...he's over there on the floor. Still twitching, I guess. Eh...My ass looks great in this dress!

I thought it was Kelly Rippa.

"Swedish dentistry goes like this."

"Madge, I Soaked In It!"

Actress Prepares To Receive Jr. Mint From Pap

"You do the hokey pokey and your turn yourself around
that's what it's all ABOUT!(claps; hands on hips)"

Lost Bridesmaid would like to Speak now rather than Hold Her Peace

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Long Meeting With Casting Director Leaves Blake Lively With Rare "Reverse Lockjaw" Condition

"Mr. Demille, I'm Ready For My Audition"

Blake Lively Prepares For Tonsillectomy At Posh NY Dentist

maybe she's gonna poop out another ingénue, that happens a lot here in new york

"I Dream We'll Gooo...Somewhere That's Green"

@unclevanya: Hah!

When I dance, they call me Macarena

Where's BuzzKillington to point out how fat she is? (or some other nonsense)

"Dress So Tight, I Have to Fart Out My Mouth!''

"I Am Beautiful And On The Best Show EVARRRR."

It's not funny.

IT'S JUST TRUE.

Sharon Stone finally undergoes enough plastic surgery to look young again

@unclevanya: Congwats!