[Actor Jude Law at a small, uncommercial film festival in the south of France today; image via Splash]
"And White People Dial the Phone Like This..."
4:23 PM on Mon May 19 2008
By Richard
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44 comments







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Actor autographs hand of his biggest fan.
INVISIBUL CHEEZBURGER
"What Do You Mean, That's Not the Shocker? Of Course It's the Shocker! Do You Have Any Idea How Many Women I've Been With? Well? Yeah, I Thought So."
Oh Jude. I really dislike him for some reason, so this is one of my all-time favourite scenes in a film:
+ Watch video
"What do you mean, the fingers I have used to dial are too fat?!"
"...and I say to you now, 'Ich bin ein Wurlitzer.'"
"MR. PRESIDENT... I DON'T HAVE A NOTEPAD... CAN YOU TELL ME AGAIN SIR WHY YOU WOULD REFERENCE NAZI GERMANY WHEN SPEAKING OF BARACK OBAMA TO THE KNESSET???"
This caption is my favorite one ever, of any contest? Why? I have no idea.
My suit is neoprene - what do you think?
"Would you like bottled or tap for the table?"
Punctuation problems" I have, them!
"This is the LancĂ´me counter. Shiseido is over there."
"And then I went 'tickle, tickle, tickle'"
I just want to point out how his sunglasses fit into the space left by his receding hair almost exactly.
"Rule #3: You will address me as His Foppishness"
And then, all of a sudden at the Automat, there was ROBERT STACK!
"This is how many orgasms I gave the nanny, Sienna. You frigid bitch."
"And I'm gonna shove these glasses so far up your ass that they come out on your eyes!"
"When palpating for the prostate it is very important to curve these digits around the posterior and caudal end before giving a gentle squeeze"
"Naaa na na na na na na! Na na na na! Hey Jude...Jude Jude Judey Judey!"
"have you guys seen that episode with 'Ass Pennies?'"
"Scotty? Now would be a good time."
"What Part of 'Beam Me Up' Don't You Understand???!!!"
"You're all clear, kid! Now let's blow this thing and - oh, double entendre!"
Yes, right, it's a fauxhawk, but in England, we call it the "dandy."
@NinaHagen: Hah! Bless you.
Jude Law practicing for his next role: Celebracadabra Season II
@VivianDarkbloom: "If you would like to request a dialing stick, pound the keyboard with your fat hand now."
"Mike Myers just called. Sprockets is a GO!"
@VivianDarkbloom: I happily await the day when the isthmus of hair becomes its own little island tuft of hair, cast adrift on his forehead.
Not that cute in this photo babe.
He Came from Outer Space to Save the Human Race...
"Finally, my hands can see in this glare"
"Damn - I've still got some nanny on my hand."
So any time you feel inane/Hey Jude, refrain/Don't carry your shades upon your knuckles
In Times Of Stress, Jude Law Often Talks To His Secret Friend, "Cool Hand Jude"
"Don't talk to me! Talk to the movie star hand!"
No Steven, Can't You Make My Hand Be The IPhone
Hotness Suddenly Reneged.
Underdeveloped Udo Keir Clone Apprehended at Cannes
We no longer want to hit that
Tintin Latest to Leave CAA for Endeavor
I AM NOT PHIL FUCKING COLLINS!!!
@richardmarxhatesmyhair: In Hollywood, even Rosie wears shades.
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