This has nothing to do with New York, media, or gossip, but sometimes we're obliged to address intense matters of global importance: as you surely have heard, Steve Irwin, better known as the Crocodile Hunter, died yesterday. The Australian was not killed by a crocodile but, rather, a stingray, while filming the documentary Ocean's Deadliest. Though there's nothing funny about the death of a beloved Australian icon, wildlife champion and your father's favorite television personality, at the guy certainly left the world with some dangling, ironic carrots.
Much to the pleasure of the internet's creepy underbelly, Irwin's demise was caught on video; the tape shows him pulling the stingray's barb from his chest before dying. We would never advocate watching such a thing (sober), but the video doesn't yet seem to be online. Not because it's too soon — no such thing on the internet! — but because it'll take some time for some punk Aussie assistant to steal himself a copy. But how long will the pervs have to wait?