Matt Damon's Weight Gain Puts Him In The Running For 'Sexiest Schlub Alive'

Formerly a featured member of the Rapid Downsize club currently bowing down to newly slim star Colin Farrell, Matt Damon has notably chunked up for his role in the true story of an FBI whistleblower in Steven Soderbergh's The Informant. And despite the part's fun-filled requirements that he stop going to the gym and live on sweet potato pancakes with crème fraîche, Damon is reportedly feeling more than a bit self-conscious about his new frame. While Ben Affleck has taken the opportunity to relive his glory days as a funny sidekick, lashing out at Damon by nailing one-liners like "the man has to buy two seats on an airplane!", chubby Matt is fearing the month of November, when People announces his successor as "Sexiest Man Alive."

Apparently Damon held out hope that he might join George Clooney and Brad Pitt among the only actors to nab the cover two years in a row, despite the fact that the two former tiara winners all but bent over in a public campaign to name him last year's winner. Initially joking to the mag on a recent red carpet about his fears of losing the crown, Damon launched into an explanation regarding his current aesthetic: "It wasn't necessarily that I needed to be fat...it was that I needed to be 'doughy.'" And Matt even apologetically curses his age for the ability to gain weight so quickly, adding that he used to be able to maintain his girlish figure while inhaling burgers and beer but, now that he's in his 30s, those habits only helped his transformation. We personally think Damon should stop being so defensive about the new look — any time he can aid off-the-radar buddy Ben Affleck in making the pages of a glossy these days is worth more than a hundred heavily airbrushed sash-wearing covers.

[Photo credits: People, Splash]