Bruno Wondering How And Why A Delicious Chickpea Spread Would Call For The Annihilation Of Israel

Can't wait until May 15, 2009 to learn what Sacha Baron Cohen has cooked up for Bruno, only the latest swarthy foreigner from the comedian's repertoire to star in a feature-length film? The internet is teeming with sightings detailing the fictional Austrian TV personality's exploiten and vëreabouts. Some you may have spotted in our very own PrivacyWatch; but the latest comes to us via The Jewish Daily Forward, where recent dupee Yossi Alpher—an Israeli political blogger—describes his run in with Eurofashion greatness in Jerusalem:

They took us down winding stone stairs and through long corridors, ostensibly to have some make-up dabbed on our noses for the cameras, in fact to meet the interviewer and test his disguise. We confronted a tall, blond-ish man in his thirties, dressed in leather and studs, his face heavily powdered, his arms and chest shaven. He spoke in a heavy German accent, his movements and mannerisms ultra-gay. He tried to write down our names, but they came out dyslexic.
And they were, indeed, basic, relating to our expectations for the Israeli-Palestinian peace process. Then one of us mentioned Hamas, and the exchange that ensued went something like this:

"Vait, vait. Vat's zee connection between a political movement and food. Vy hummus?"

We exchanged astonished glances. "Hamas," we explained, "is a Palestinian Islamist political movement. Hummus is a food."

"Ya, but vy hummus? Yesterday I had to throw away my pita bread because it vas dripping hummus. Unt it's too high in carbohydrates."

The Hamas-hummus confusion went on for several minutes. Then, the interviewer declared: "Your conflict is not so bad. Jennifer-Angelina is worse."

Alpher offers a fascinating glimpse into the mind of a SBC mark as he attempts to explain why he and his Palestinian counterpart submitted themselves to a series of increasingly imbecilic questions: "We knew something ludicrous was happening but couldn't quite figure it out...we were pressured for time and just wanted to finish." There also exists, of course, the possibility that they knew exactly who Bruno really was was all along (Cohen did plenty of Israeli promotion for Borat), and that they just wanted to take part in a summer comedy blockbuster. And if they were to be poor sports about it, there's also the promise of a lawsuit payday, due to the emotional pain and suffering of having been subjected to the Austrian whipping down his skinny-jeans and displaying his führskin in an impromptu game of anatomical show-and-tell.