We don't know how many more young Hollywood power-couple breakups our hearts can bear: Days after learning that Drew Barrymore would never again look the Mac Guy in his built-in iSights, cooing, "You're so unbelievably special and have a huge, amazing heart. You really do have the soul of a manatee—free and strong and beautiful," out of the side of her mouth, comes word now that Sarah Silverman and Jimmy Kimmel's open-fucking-relationship is no longer. (Sure, this seems like Matt Damon's perfect opportunity to swoop in and bag the potty-mouthed Jewess of his dreams, but we'd argue that it was the illicit nature of their mini-bar rendezvous that really fueled the affair. Now that she's available, we doubt we'll be hearing any musical odes to fat Damon moustache rides.) While their flacks would only offer, "Jimmy and Sarah will have no further comment," usmagazine.com spotted Silverman with "a male friend" at WeHo bruncherie Hugo's, where they obsessively chronicled her every menu choice, facial expression, and A-list tableside condolence:
"She really looked like she was in good spirits," an observer tells Us. "She was laughing and smiling. Very animated."
But a few minutes later, Silverman - who ate organic quinoa topped with fresh fruit - grew somber and became enthralled in a heart-to-heart conversation with her pal.
"She was talking and it looked like he was listening and then advising her," the onlooker tells Us. "This went on for around 20 minutes."
Mutual friend Jonah Hill - who has appeared in comedy skits on Kimmel's ABC show - was dining in the restaurant and also stopped by to say hello.
"Jonah's appearance definitely had an effect on her," a witness tells Us. "They spoke for just a minute. And after he left, Sarah looked momentarily pensive."
We'll spare you their breathtaking coverage of what Silverman's eyebrows were doing when she asked for a coffee refill, and analysis of the sounds coming from the women's bathroom (muffled sobs, streaming liquid) after she briefly excused herself from the table. The last thing anyone wants or needs after a difficult breakup is to have their every move scrutinized—particularly any pensiveness one might experience after a close friend with romantic designs offers, "You want a shoulder to cry on? Or a funny shlub who actually knows what he's doing in the sack? You call me, Sar. Enjoy the quinoa. Works wonders on the colon," before smiling empathetically and sailing out the doors.