Nick,

Why do you try to frame the contents of this post as circumspection? Everyone knows that Julia is on your speed dial. And the "I'm-poking-fun-at-her-oh-so-gently-but-we-all-know-I-really-love-her" shtick is pretty weak, too.

The past two weeks have proven to me that, apparently, there's a lot of crap I can tolerate from this site. However, the constant insults to my intelligence are wearing thin.

Laying dead in the tub, Julia Allison finally became funny.

I have a desire to fill that tub with strawberry flavored milk.

@TheHonJudgeSmails2: Damn!

So, uh...what's the "interesting" angle here again?

@SlimShadenfruede: Or gerbils and eels.

"Ma'am, this is Home Depot, not one of your swing joints."

Oh, not an open caption post? I don't care, then.

@TheHonJudgeSmails2:

Is this circumspection, or career advice from a de facto life coach?

@TheHonJudgeSmails2: this post isn't for you... it's for the masses. Julia Allison sells papers! or page views. you know what I mean.

No comment on whether the success of her new venture, "Fameball or Die," is strictly tied to every hunched NYC journo's desire to see her appear on "Naked or Die."

I vote for "die."

"Arrested Development" was cancelled, yet "Two and a Half Men" remains on the air.

I'm not sure this "be funny, or die" maxim holds up.

@hypocriteoath: You raise a fair point. He's running a business, not a playground for commenters. Still, I just can't abide something so disingenuous silently. And does she really rake in that many pageviews? Serious question, I have no idea.

@In Other News...: Seriously. I'd back off if Nick would just come clean about the nature of their business relationship, here.

@hypocriteoath:

Nothing like jeopardizing the currency you've established with your dedicated readers in favor of page views. It's a dicey long-term strategy, but who knows - maybe their little bright shining star here will nab a half-hour on E! or something just in time for the final phase of Gawker's transition into the poor man's TMZ.

@hypocriteoath: Let's be honest, if this site wasn't posting about the fame whore once to twice a week, would you actually care about her?

I feel like Gawker is doing for Ms. Allison, what the rest of the gossip media did for the Beckhams. If you hammer in something enough, even for the most intelligent of readers, they will succumb...or just start reading a new blog.

Mayday, mayday, mayday. This is Gawker 2-0-0-8. Position 40 43 North 74 00 West. My boat is on fire and sinking. Repeat we are sinking. Request immediate assistance. Over.

I would instead advise her to try out for "FunnyOrPlayboySpread.com"

@TheHonJudgeSmails2:

"And does she really rake in that many pageviews? Serious question, I have no idea."

Of course not. She's completely uninteresting. Nobody cares about her outside of her, her parents, and Denton. But he finds her fascinating, so he assumes the rest of us do, and we get all Julia all the time. Just like he thinks the rest of his media buddies are so interesting, when no one cares. And apparently Denton must take Adderall, or think it's "edgy" or something, so we get 5 posts a day on it.

He doesn't like "The Unethicist," so that goes, even though it's hilarious.

Just change the name from "Gawker" to the "Nick Denton Vanity Project" and be done with it.

@BrianVan: "FunnyOrMarryRichLikeNow-ishBeforeDroopingSetsIn.net."

It's (inadvertently) funny that the article making fun of Julia Allison for not being funny is - not funny.

So, has anyone sent her new meal ticket a link to the live blogging in which she so clearly displayed that she can never be trusted with any personal secrets and then tried to blow it off as just a big oopsie?

Who the fuck is Julia Allison and why does Gawker have a Julie Allison beat?

Julia Allison is the next Britney Spears. Gawker's just ahead of the curve. I'm guessing Dr. Phil is on his way over to her place right now to stage an intervention, or take care of her dog, or whatever will get ratings.

@econdave: I think you're, for the most part, correct. All I ask is transparency.

When Nick was just the owner of the site, a hidden agenda was semi-excusable... but now that he's appointed himself Managing Editor, I think we deserve some sort of explanation?

Also, I thought that the Julia Allison character was supposed to be Gawker's ironic answer to the celebrity gossip madness, which is vapid no matter who the celebrity is, and no matter if she is "real" or "pseudo". Julia being not only "pseudo" but also "Gawker's proprietary" is actually perfect for the role. I think it's a great concept. It just has to be done right, and I have to say that Emily did it right. I am not so sure that Nick is doing it the way it has to be done so it doesn't sound like banging on an empty pot.

@TheHonJudgeSmails2: I'm just wondering--are you really insulted? I mean, do you really care? Or do you just "cyber-care"? This is basically a question for everyone. I have certainly felt frustrated reading both comments and posts here on Gawker before, but it doesn't keep me awake at night. Some commenters are forming protests and the like. To what end, I wonder? I think it's totally fine to complain, to boycott, to comment, whatever. But for some reason, I tend to ease toward making light jokes. But I really get the feeling that Gawker has hurt some commenters' feelings around here! Is this true? Am I way far off? Is all your frustration just for fun? Does complaining reap some sort of intellectual reward that I just don't get cuz I'm kind of dumb? Again, I'm not making fun. Just wondering.

@econdave: You know who cares about Julia Allison the most? The people who constantly contribute page views to the posts about her here to bitch and moan about how much they don't care about Julia Allison.

If you don't care, DONT CLICK!

I propose that Gawker compensate for the elimination of commenter auditions by implementing some sort of commenter assisted-suicide program. Like, I'm shivering on the tile floor in the fetal position here and I'm kinda losing hope...

Hey guys, FYI, everything related to Julia Allison is now officially a big deal.

@Codepink: I just "cyber-care". It doesn't keep me up at night, either. But, I do care about the quality of the content and subject covered here, as much as I can, I guess.

If I care enough to post humorous responses to good material, I suppose it's only natural that I care enough to post not-so-nice ones when I think the content sucks.

I'm not going to protest or anything, but I might just stop coming to the site so often. I don't think that matters at all to anyone but me. I'm not delusional. I'd rather make my opinion known in hopes of eliciting change, than simply leave.

@econdave: "The Unethicist" was nixed? Well slap me and tell me my name is not Susan! When and why the hell did that happen? I now have no moral compass. Seriously, why?

@Codepink:

I care in the vein of, like, "I'm kinda getting sick of these potato chips".

@Codepink: Yeah, I know that Gawker is basically a space for cracking wise, but it was something more for a while, to some people. Gawker is like 1980 Rolling Stone or MTV in 1995.

@TheHonJudgeSmails2: That makes total sense. Thanks. I think the whole thing's really interesting. Stick around, friend. I like your jokes and, to some extent, your complaints. :)

@Chaim Gnadelstein: ha!

@TheHonJudgeSmails2: I'd miss you, luv.

@MayorMcCheese: There was no announcement, but I asked in the comments a couple of days ago and Denton was courteous enough to reply. He said they're negotiating something new with Gabe. So for that at least I'm going to give Gawker 2008 more time.

@MayorMcCheese:

Why? Because Denton didn't like it. That simple.

So when will this site get honest, take the Sun/Page 3 route, and start posting some topless pics?
A view is a view is a view, yes?

@DorothyMantooth: @Codepink: You two really grill my cheese.

@Chaim Gnadelstein: You don't has to try out to comment anymore??? kthxbai

@Hot Foot: I only click to read what commenters have to say about the evil witch.

Great, another shitty Julia Allison post, and another Gawkerless week for me. You'll make a star out of her yet, Nick!

@Codepink, it's just kinda depressing to watch a great site go down in flames like this. Can't speak for anyone else, but retardo JA posts signify a fundamental shift in sensibilities. Roffle posts about JA were fun. Weird promo posts for JA, not much fun.

@TheHonJudgeSmails2: I guess she does, otherwise I don't think Denton would keep this up. unless our mean comments generate views... this is possible.
@Chaim Gnadelstein: that sounds probable.
@spielarama: the real questions is; even after all these posts... do I actually care at all?

@The One: agreed. you disgruntled commenters are only encouraging the behavior you're complaining about. get a clue.

Let's all us commenters take a page from the Hollywood writers and stage a good ol' fashioned walk-out. To commence upon the appearance of, say, the JA post. Like, for each JA item posted, we respond with one full day of diminished page view revenue.

"...appearance of the NEXT JA post".

Geez...nothing gets people organized like typos.

I'm not sure Nick cares that much about commenters. Face it, there's a line right out that door filled with people just a little too smart for TMZ waiting to take all of our places.

And frankly, they'll read this crap whether we're here or not.

My guess? Commenters make up less than 30% of the page views here. Nick, care to comment?

@Clarence Rosario: I think 30% is way too high. I'm going to guess it might even be in the single digits.

Nick hasn't said anything yet on this post, and I'm doubting that he will.

Seriously, folks. Don't look at it, and it will go away. Even if a JA post gets 300 comments full of vitriol about how much they hate JA, those 300 comments are still 300 comments. Those 10,000+ pageviews are still 10,000+ pageviews.

What is clear about the whole JA mess is that Nick Denton can't or won't distinguish between "good" pageviews/comments and "bad" pageviews/comments. A pageview is a pageview is a pageview in his eyes. Knowing this, you can either boycott the JA machine or inadvertantly keep feeding it. The choice is yours.

@Chaim Gnadelstein: This could be why almost every writer/editor for this site jumped ship last year.

ughhhh. and if you are going to sell out and go down the gossip highway, let's pick people who are at least actually famous.

@Furious_George: But I do want to see her topless.

So will Julia Allsion now be the one in viral videos in the part of a two-year-old who curses and slaps Will Ferrell around?