It's not exactly news that Roger Ailes, News Corporation's brilliant but amoral Goebbels, is vindictive. Kurt Andersen mentioned, almost casually, that the Fox News founder had threatened to trail his 3 and 5-year-old kids in pre-emptive retaliation for an article the New York Magazine columnist was writing. But Dan Cooper, a colleague of Ailes during the early days of Fox News, has had even more lurid encounters with the irascible TV newsman, now posted to a personal blog.

Ailes, who admitted after one tantrum that he was a diagnosed paranoid, according to Cooper, was the subject of a New York Magazine profile; Cooper was interviewed on background. Ailes' former colleague claims he was fired by his agent after Ailes discovered he'd been briefing. Cooper remembers being told: "I got a phone call from Roger Ailes an owwa ago. He told me that until I drop you as a cloyent, any demo tapes I send ovah for talent jobs will sit in the cawwna and gatha dust." Such drama!

The only flaw in the story: Cooper claims that Fox News' Brain Room, officially the cable news network's research department, also housed a counterintelligence and black ops office, able to access phone records, which would explain how Ailes suspected Cooper had been snitching. Look who's paranoid now.

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[Alternate headline, suggested below: "Who knew that Jabba the Hutt was a real person?"]