Groggy Britney Spears Asks You What Month It is

  • Britney Spears hanger-on Sam Lutfi must henceforth keep 250 yards from the singer because as Britney's mom reminded us, he "gave Britney Spears pills ground up in her food to keep her quiet and at one point he told Britney she had to take 10 pills a day if she wanted to see her two young children." [Reuters]
  • Lutfi's lawyer tried to say he wasn't properly served with the restraining order paperwork. The judge basically laughed. Lutfi's legal team then asked if the judge would like maybe a home-made scone or some coffee or maybe an "aspirin."
  • Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes will supposedly come to Prince's hot Oscar party, along with Penelope Cruz. When the catfighting and Scientology recruiting speeches begin, scoot on over to the real LA Oscar party, hosted by queen diva Elton John.
  • Ryan Phillippe endorsed Obama, and has the cool Shepard Fairey t-shirt to prove it. Against all odds, the left-of-Hillary, cool and charismatic black Democratic candidate is dominating among gorgeous celebrities. [X17]
  • Brangelina were confused, until they realized Clint Eastwood and his wife were waiting for them at the uncool restaurant across the street. Then everyone not pregnant ordered wine and got drunk and happy. Lesson: Clint Eastwood likes to drink. Oh, and you'll usually have a better time at the uncool restaurant! [Showbiz Spy]
  • Teen star Miley Cyrus apologized for not wearing her seatbelt in a movie or raising your children for you or transforming you into a responsible human being who has better things to do than yell at a teen star over some stupid shit. [AP]
  • Riverbank Hotel staff "baffled" that Amy Winehouse trashed her room over two weeks, leaving "the floor strewn in champagne bottles and unwashed knickers." Maybe if she had checked in under the assumed name "I Live To Trash Hotel Rooms" they might have seen this coming. Probably not, though. [Showbiz Spy]
  • Eminem to finally let the world in on his family dramas and emotional issues, in a book. [People]
  • Moby thinks people hate him because Natalie Portman was his girlfriend this one time. Oh, Moby. [P6]