Gawker
Andrew Morton wrote in his best-selling biography of Tom Cruise that the Hollywood star was prominent in the hierarchy of the Church of Scientology. Of all of the author's claims, it was the one that most enraged the sect: "Insinuations that Mr. Cruise is second-in-command of the Church are not only false, they are ludicrous," the Scientologists maintained. "He is neither 2nd or 100th. Mr. Cruise is a Scientology parishioner and holds no official or unofficial position in the Church hierarchy. Claims to the contrary are offensive to both Mr. Cruise and the Church." But if Cruise was merely a humble parishioner, why in Xenu's name did the sect spend six figures to celebrate his birthday in 2004? In a video obtained by Gawker, watch Scientology chief David Miscavige lead the sect's most famous follower into an extravagant celebration of the Hollywood star on Scientology cruise ship, Freewinds. Cruise's entrance is, of course, to the theme music from Top Gun, one of the movies for which the actor is best known, or was, until he took up his new role as evangelist for the bizarre Church. After the movie clips are played, and the bands perform, Cruise exclaims: "This is incredible... It's the best birthday ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, and I mean ever!" We agree! The best moment: watch Cruise in a duet of Old Time Rock and Roll, demonstrating the dance moves we first saw in Risky Business, the picture that made his name. He was so young then; and we, thankfully, knew so much less about him. VIDEO»
Secret Video: The Scientologists Celebrate The Birthday Of The Prophet, Tom Cruise
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1:55 PM on Fri Mar 14 2008
By Nick Denton
333,234 views
167 comments
Comments
Sweet Georgia Brown is that man nutty.
where's katie?
I never thought it would be possible to say this, but Tom Cruise is a genius. Somehow he has convinced me, a total nobody, to feel genuinely sorry for the world's richest and most successful movie star in history.
This will NEVER get old, and easily trumps the Scientology video as proof that Tom Cruise is batshit crazy.
Are you sure that took place on a cruise ship and not inside the Thetan-free chamber that is Tom Cruise's ego? That was maybe the best thing I've seen this week. Speech! Speech!
barf. in. the. mouth.
Tom Cruise's Insane Scientology Birthday Party Video
[digg.com]
Who knows? We can only hope, though, that she's out of Los Angeles, has dyed her and her child's hair, and is now living under an assumed name, moving from one small Midwestern town to the next when COS's agents start closing in.@hugomania:
I hate.
You've lost that sane feeling. Oh-oh that sane feeling.
@Furious George: forreal. i'm cringing so hard it fucking hurts. this isn't even fun to make fun of anymore.
I somewhat expected him to start yelling "Developers, Developers, Developers" mid way through the clip ...
it's a dvd. holy fuck.
For the love of Xenu...
Tom Cruise sings as well as he acts.
I will never bet against the house of Denton. Nicely done, Nick.
@DonLaFontaine: Don't you mean "Tech Support?"
You have to admit those crazy Scientologists really know how to party!
FYE -- Ethan Hunt: There is a mole inside the Scientology sect providing embarrassing videos of you to Gawker head, Nick Denton. Your mission -- if you choose to accept -- infiltrate Denton's gang of nefarious snarksters as a commenter, gain his trust, and determine the identity of the mole. You are to contact a self-obsessed blogger, codename: JA. She will lead you straight to him. This message will self-destruct...
wait, this confirms my belief that denton is secretly a /b/-tard. just...a successful one.
You ever notice that white mega-star cult members be all dancin like this, but black mega-star cult members . . .
I don't think this is so over the top. Look at the birthday party Christians throw for Jesus every year. And he wasn't even IN Top Gun.
You can tell he really feels uncomfortable under the glare. Poor guy.
@Furious George:
I'll be extra careful next time I get transferred to Tech Support, Level Upper Operating Thetan ...
You know, that Steve Stevens Top Gun riff never fails to make me want to give a Russian the finger.
I'm honestly beginning to feel bad for Tom. In that kinda awkward, drama club kid who just needs some love. It would be a lot easier to find said love if he, say, just came out already.
What? No Kenny Loggins' "Playing with the Boys?"
I feel like there are only two states I see this guy in anymore- either violently happy or hopping mad.
This is the reason Tom Cruise has not , and never will appear in a comedy film.He has absolutely nada, no, not even a bit, not even a kind of, sense of humour.If he did he'd realise he was in fact attending a middle-aged Guido's bar mitzvah which is in turn only attended by sophisticated butch lesbians in white trouser suits.Who have horrific taste in music.And like hosting events in revamped spaceships bought from the Area 51 hangar with vast amounts of Scientology money.
it's like watching a kid with downs at chuck e cheese celebrate his bday
What is he laughing at? Really? What? I need to know.
@Claystil: now if they'd found a way to get Berlin back together THAT would have been a party.
@Furious George: oh come now, you're not a nobody! you're a star commenter on gawker!
Just take those old records off the shelf!
PS - I'm reading a great book about conspracies within NASA. Aparently L.Ron Hubby was tight with Aleister Crowley through the co-founder of Jet Propulsion Laboratories, Jack Parsons. In a nutshell, Jack Parsons used to tear the back out of the woman that Hubbard would later marry. The were all a bunch of wife-swapping wiccans! (okay, not really wiccans, but i wanted some onomatopoeic effect).
Oh, I so want K-Tel to do my birthday party!
It looks like every other cheesy live show on a cruise ship. But why is everyone dressed so badly?
Jesus, how tall is Miscavige?
i honestly don't even understand.
um. for one brief but certain moment, when he dropped that first split, i thought to myself, "Tom Cruise is really sexy." Now I understand what happened to Katie...
Oh this man gives me the willies.
@blackbirdfly: He never truly recovered from the loss of Goose.
If that's what 'clear' looks like, I'm keeping my body thetans nice and close
@PickleTitsTurner: his birthday is july 3rd so we know she hasn't runaway. yet. so. where is she?
Was anyone else expecting Enya to come out there and do the theme song from "Far and Away"?
Can't...wait...until...Cruise takes over the CO$. Going to be the best ever, ever, ever and I mean ever!
So... who is that studly young man that walks in with him?
@Claystil: that was later on the poop deck
And look! There's Anthony Edwards ... busing tables.
He doesn't have an official position with Scientology but they throw him his "best ever" birthday party? I would imagine it was another Scientologist's birthday that day, did they rent a ship, a band, a singer, and have a couple hundred people celebrate THAT person? His visibility obviously has done much for their church, but to deny he doesn't have a special position in their church and then throw him a bash like this is rather silly. I don't care what Scientologists do to shut people up, they will never get people to see that they are legitimate.
This is what I don't understand about Tom Cruise and Scientology. In cults, it's usually important to step back and let the leader be all god-like and important. Tom Cruise is so desperate to be the centre of attention that he can't let anyone else be in the spotlight for a second - he even feels compelled to take over from the singer, even though he's not a singer himself. It's hard to picture someone so self-centred having any role in a cult other than that of the leader.
@janesays: David Miscavige, head of the church.