How come Megan Asha doesn't get a tag? She's the hottest one.

Allow me to be the first to wretch vomit all over the walls and ceilings.

@collegecallgirl: Clever idea -- play them off each other.

You created this monster, Gawker. Don't act like you're not complicit in the nightmare.

Totally worth watching for the angle-angling.

The Death of New York. Again.

Do you look at this and think "I made this!!"?

Julia Allison: The It Buttereverything.

I can see LolCait's fingerprint, just left of Julia's handbag. Also, where'd Julia's boobs go?

@collegecallgirl: She doesn't have a dog. Yet.

In paranoid fit, Rambin rubs everyone's stomachs looking for Lodwick spawn...

I saw a pile of those Moe bags in a dusty corner at Bloomingdales. Can you believe she charges $150 for that shit?

The Real Soon-to-Be Housewives of NYC

@CaptainFantastic: She left them in the hamper.

You misread the article - it will actually be a PPV Cage Match elimination tourney among the people shown in the pictures; to make teams even, Emily will join team "I famewhored for years and all I got was Gawker fame."

@Hot Foot: That's part of the nightmare. It starts out as a bit of harmless fun, an attempt to create some Gawker characters that haven't been simply handed to us by Page Six. And, then, at some point, they take a life of their own, and we cover them, not because we want to, but because they generate reader attention; and, then, because other people cover them. Well, it's done now.

I've always thought the posts on these people pointed out their banality, and their lack of awareness thereof. Does that translate to good television (as if such a thing existed)?

@hamburgerhotdog: Don't you just love how they wrap around your wrist, so when you hit the can after six Caramel Mango Melon Martini Splashes you can totes forget you have it on and dunk it the bowl when you go to wipe?

This is like watching your favorite indie band graduate to theater gigs except the exact opposite.

i hope you drink tonight because of this, denton.

i've just added this to my "reasons why i'm drinking on a work night" alongside "it is a work night" and "if i drink enough, food network becomes the best network."

@Nick Denton: When you created these characters, couldn't you at least have tried to roll them higher Charisma scores?

Mary Rambin is checking to see if Damian is kicking yet.

@Nick Denton: Yes! It seems to be done now doesn't it! Understatement of the decade! Thanks so much Mr. Denton!

@Nick Denton: Why didn't you try to create Gawker characters that are cookie cutter versions of everyone else that Page Six writes about?

Also, are you trying to make us swallow the "It's not my fault, society made me do it!" line?

I T Girls! GET IT??

@AndSheSaid: Also, are you trying to make us swallow the "It's not my fault, society made me do it!" line? Yes.

@AndSheSaid: I'm not talking to him anymore. He deserves the silent treatment for the next hour or year or however long this reality series is on the air.

@mathnet: ah, clever!

@mathnet: Actually, I don't. I want to, though.

Oh, Valleywag looked up Megan Asha. She used to date the Valley's influential-but-creepy tech blogger, Michael Arrington. Sun Microsystems heiress? Hmm, not really. Her dad was a senior engineer there.
[valleywag.com]

Mary Rambin looks really scared.

As well she should.

Denton gave us the bait ... we bit ... click and comment, click and comment (mea culpa) ... however, right from the beginning it was clear that the fatal flaw of JA et al is their complete oblivion to the truism: less is more (you'd think a dating columnist would know this ... no wonder she's single ... who needs to "get to know her" ... it's been done ad nauseum). Anyway, I predict implosion. Then more desperate grasping ... I don't want to think beyond that.

@moff: Do you mean I T! Would you like me to explain I T to you! I T would be no problem, really!

Balk started it

There is absolutely nothing "IT" about any of these girls.

Guys, look at it this way: some of us commenters might get into a macro shot which will show JA's real-time response whilst taking in our scathing commentary on her life! In short - POSSIBLE INSTANT SCHAUDENFREUDE RAMEN!!!!!

But I thought JA quit blogging to get her life back? Or something? Who cares, I give up.

ellagood CAN BE THE VILLAIN. I call Guildenstern-esque minority commenter!

Seriously!

I hope we (gawker posters) & maybe, perhaps, probably Nick Denton, would be getting a cut of all future earnings of JA et al; afterall we created this monster, hence should be compensated for the agonising birthing pain!!

I mean, its only fair, ne pas?

I'm done.
I can't do this anymore. It's ruining my life.

I thought that people could see through the bullshit, but they can't. And it's not their fault. It's mine.

If all of this comes at the expense of my personal life, I don't want it.

So … thank you for reading.

I don't know when or if I'll be back, but at the very least I need a little break

...at least until my reality show comes on the air.

flying cross-country for exclusive Silicon Alley events

They've even scared the NY tech scene all the way out West...

@RocketRockit: It will be revealed in Season 1's cliffhanger that a cameraman from the show accidentally knocked her unconscious with his tripod. The penultimate shot will be the ambulance trailing off screen, carrying Julia Allison to Lenox Hill Hospital, where her ultimate demise awaits. The last shot will be grainy, black-and-white security camera video, showing a producer surreptitiously sitting at her computer, going to the "Dashboard" link on Julia's site, and typing in those immortal words - "I'm done. I can't do this anymore..."

i'd rather watch tionna smalls

This is the second time a nightmare of mine has actually come true. The first time, it involved a swarm of ladybugs, and I woke up in a cold sweat.

This is most certainly worse.

At least, they had the decency to put "actress" in scare quotes for Annabel, although Fiery Diamond Heiress might be pushing it. It's like Lipstick Jungle Gym.

they look like they are posing at a sweet sixteen party

I will bet their online business will be a website on how to start an online business.

@Nick Denton:
Duke: I know a life of crime has led me to this sorry fate, and yet, I blame society. Society made me what I am.
Otto: That's bullshit. You're a white suburban punk just like me.
Duke: Yeah, but it still hurts.

I'm guessing there will be a lot of Miami Beach meetings.

Any chance they're having an open call? I'd like to go up for the part of Karl Hungus, expert cable repairman.

@Nick Denton: At last you explain! Thank you!

You know somehow you will end up on that reality show. They will find you lunching somewhere and ambush you with a large camera crew in tow. Beware, Dr. Denton, beware!!! Your monster will find you!

@AndSheSaid: "John Wayne was a fag"

I think it's awesome! Cause I definitely enjoyed seeing Bravo document the ever entertaining Paula Abdul's adventures.

Oh Megan Asha, how one of kind you are. See you again soon.

@Tippi from Toronto: I think Nick will be like an anti-Charlie calling the "It Angels" each week to give them a business assignment like changing the toner cartridge or downloading email.

@moff:

* Strength 6
* Intelligence 3
* Wisdom 3
* Dexterity 6
* Constitution 10
* Charisma 3
* Comeliness 4

Nick Denton: Purrrfect.