Gawker
"But Walter L. Wagner and Luis Sancho contend that scientists at the European Center for Nuclear Research, or CERN, have played down the chances that the collider could produce, among other horrors, a tiny black hole, which, they say, could eat the Earth. Or it could spit out something called a 'strangelet' that would convert our planet to a shrunken dense dead lump of something called 'strange matter.'" Wagner and Sancho are suing the Department of Energy, and others, in Federal court to temporarily halt work on a giant particle accelerator outside Geneva until scientists can satisfy them that it, and the universe, will not go BOOM.
"Scientists say that is very unlikely — though they have done some checking just to make sure." Okay, as long as they've done some checking. That was a close one! [NYT]
Comments
Now this is some litigation I can get behind.
Does the activating of this particle accelerator coincide with the year 2012 at all?
If so, we're totally fucked.
Most of my life has already become a dead lump of strange matters.
What's to worry? Our planet is already covered in dense lumps.
How many years until society reverts to ritual sacrifices to Amun Ra?
I know this isn't a big science-y blog, but the Earth is bombarded daily by high-speed particles (much like those produced by the collider), so if it was possible for this kind of thing to destroy the Earth it would have happened already. And also, we would be seeing things in outer space getting devoured the same way on a regular basis. But we're not. So, cancel the end-of-the-world parties.
Surely the M. Night Shamaylan movie is already in post.
Stuff White People Like #178: Eschewing their weekend NYT habit, and drifting away in the sure arms of Spiegelman. Three cheers.
I've screwed up at work before, but accidentally creating a mini black hole that sucked the earth into it and simultaneously killed everything on it, now that would be hard to top.
@TheRightHonourablePrimeMinister: What if I already rented the keg and slept with six people under the guise of "this could be the end"?
Ah, so that's what my ex meant by calling me a strangelet. I thought he meant small and strange. This is much more apt.
@TheRightHonourablePrimeMinister: Oh Gordon - you and your neutrino love. I'll blame Kirkcaldy if anything goes wrong. In fact, I blame Kirkcaldy on general principle.
I mean, what if a quark or something cracks open and Jeff Goldblum climbs out with a hairy back? Have you thought of that?
@Colonel Mustard: Try spicing up your pickup lines ... with science!
@VirusWithShoes: Our scienticians assure me that Jeff Goldblum's back was just as hairy before the incident.
@TheRightHonourablePrimeMinister: If things do go wrong, at least it would mean some sort of comeback for Geena Davis and that guy with the melty-leg.
A little bit of a re-hash, but I want them to succeed soon, so Bush can have a news conference discussing the weak and strong "nucular" forces.
I was blinded by science. It was the 80's.
Anything that will clear off my credit card debt I am for.
O here we go again. The millennium bug people -- remember how the world was going to be turned into a giant electronic knish the second that the year 2000 arrived -- have had nothing to obsess on for eight years. Okay so now when someone flicks on the switch at CERN the world will be sucked into a black hole? Cool. I want the beer concession.
@Mike_Jahn: Indeed.
I was, and still am, Y2K complacent.
@VirusWithShoes: If you were English, rather than Scots, I would be accusing you of being Jasper Fforde.
What really happens is we get sucked into a parallel universe where Spock has a beard, Dr. McCoy is Joseph Mengele, and Tribbles are blood-sucking meerkats.
I want to meet the judge who is willing to rule in favor of black holes eating the Earth.
Would be almost worth it, to see those final headlines plunked out by Ian & his fellow Gawkers, refusing to quit as long as those back-up generators hold...
- Rigor mortis is the new botox!
- Buffet, Gates, Helu and the "Dubai Dozen" compete to see if the one with the most toys wins.
- Top TV show: Can You Design a Generator?
- New Tom Cruise Scientology Video Parody
- Al Gore wins Nobel Prize, Oscar, Emmy, SAGs, Kids Choice Award, cemetery plot & Readers Digest Sweepstakes for Anti-CERN documentary
- A-list actor turned super-mechanic called in to fix Page Six Generator!
- Clive Owen Tries to Save the Last Baby
- Sexy Generator Mechanic to replace Damon in upcoming Bourne Definitely, Really, Truly the Final One
- "The Hills" Movie Cancelled
- Sentate Bill to Legalize Gay Marriage Between Generator Designers & Mechanics Passes
- Gawker Sightings: Paris Hilton Seen with Page Six's Generator Mechanic. Britney Spears Seen With Page Six Generator.
- Liz Smith Is So Old
- Matt Damon's God-Nephew's Cousin Twice-Removed Fucking Kimmel's Head Writer's Second Cousin's Cabana Boy
- Final Open Caption [picture of the world blowing up]
- April Fools! Brangelina's Kids SAVE THE ENTIRE EFFING WORLD!
I now have some new buzz words for my sandwich board.
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