Starbucks Geniuses To Stop Burning Coffee This Morning, Change World ForeverStarbucks is set to begin selling a "smoother" - read: non-burnt - cup of coffee at all company-owned locations this morning. CEO Howard Schultz told the Journal the new roast is meant to "reinvent brewed coffee." Ah, so now properly roasting your beans makes you a revolutionary. That must be why the press release calls this day "historic" and the roast itself "historic." What could possibly be more hyperbolic than that? Oh, right, a brainwashed barista on StabucksGossip.com saying this will save the lives of children. I almost forgot!

This is the finest coffee that we can make. ALL of this coffee is in the store within 2 weeks of its roasting date, and is fresh everyday, delivered from our new roasting plant, intended for your satisfaction. Its a mild coffee and is made fresh every 30 minutes, instead of every hour. Starbucks spent alot of money on this.

I just would like to share with you, that we are not just about baristas, and frapps. Its about the farmers as well. We help their children eat, and the farmers take great joy into working with us. I encourage all of you on Tuesday to go to your local store and try the new blend. And when you try it, think of the positives instead of just assuming the coffee sucks. To us, coffee is a goal, and a dream. If anything, work together.

We have gone astray with the values that we used to have, so hang in there as we transform that company back to what it was inteded. Quality service, and great tasting, fresh, coffee.