In addition to making fun of your mother's death and mocking people for supposedly aging prematurely, Harvey Levin's TMZ loves to write oh-so-clever sex-pun headlines. The one pictured ran with a story about Britney Spears being ordered to pay hundreds of thousands of dollars in lawyer's fees. There are some more, just from the past couple of days, after the jump. Reading them well help you develop the vital skill of applying a dick joke to virtually any situation.
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Comments
Harvey Wallbanger.
I should apply for a job with TMZ. All I do during my workday lately is write dick jokes.
Yesterday my client wanted an article about the "20 Men That Make Bears Spank Their Crank."
I made Chewbacca #14 with the explanation "Real men want nookie from the wookie."
I seem to recall long ago when a little tabloid weekly on the cusp of the Hamptons -- editor to remain unidentified -- boasted about its coverage of local proms, parties, and other such celebrations with the headline "we cover your balls."
TMZ should create a banner ad for themselves by using a picture of Britney and then putting the text "Come Here Often?" over her chest.
"It's The Cheesiest!" ought to work for the majority of their subjects.
TMZ Takes It In the Brit.
They still can't touch CNN.
Sienna Miller seems a bit out of place, that's not a wardrobe malfunction - that's a Thursday.
Drudge seems to enjoy the occassional Congressional probe.
Bend It Like (this in front of) Beckham
@drunkexpatwriter: A true professional you are, sir.
@skahammer: Hey,if you can't have fun with porn,you can't have fun with anything.
@drunkexpatwriter: How well I know this...sadly.
@drunkexpatwriter: Funny thing is, many straight men here want nookie with Wookie, too.
@GeorgeBabbitt: Everyone has the right to have some furry fun from time time.
@drunkexpatwriter:From what little I've seen, I don't think Wookie is very hairy. And I don't think she'd take kindly to your implying so. She's lovely, but she can be fierce. ;-)
@GeorgeBabbitt: Well, I haven't seen her, so I can only go by the time.
I mean, I'm sober at the moment, but I wouldn't expect people to assume so.
Kinda like if I called myself Bart9plus on a dating site, I couldn't complain if women were eventually disappointed.
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