I'll chalk this whole thing up to yet another situation I just don't understand.

"Hello, I am Anna Wintour, and this is my 'intern', who just can't seem to keep it behind the blue line... can't seem to keep it out of the net... likes body-checking and hip-checking... and keeps scoring on one-timers... if you know what I mean."

Did't he rupture his spleen like a week ago?

Item: The must-have look this fall will be the toothless grin.

Malkin wanted the internship at n+1 because he is Russian and all but his team is actually playing for the damn Stanley Cup.

She's just trying to make Roger Federer jealous. It won't work, Anna!

He's going to go back to the team in the fall with all new meanings for faceoff, body check, blocking, hell even icing.

@Goober_Pea:

"I'LL define 'icing' in this relationship, thank you very much."

- Anna Wintour

@cardboardbelt: "Come here my little Sean-y Sean, let me kiss you torso and make your spleen all better. And, can you make me 40 copies?"

Best Punk'd evah

So he dated Elisha Cuthbert for two weeks and now he's gay?

Excuse me ... WHAT?? What the FUCK??

@In Other News...: "He's also keen on slipping the rubber past the crease."

@cardboardbelt: My thoughts exactly.

@belltolls: Nicely done.

Roger Federer is going to be jeaaaaalous.

Maybe they just like skiing, y'all!