Brittany Murphy Back Off The Pixie Dust

Two years after Disney executives nudged Brittany Murphy before a roomful of gathered press, then detonated a confetti-filled landmine which left one Reuters photographer legless from the knees down, comes news that the once white-hot Hollywood Was-Girl has been replaced by order of Disney animation head John Lasseter as the voice of Tinker Bell in that sprite's direct-to-video adventures. Explains hollywood-newsroom.com:

[The original] Tinker Bell was a disaster. The story didn’t work, too many fart jokes and lesbian innuendoes. The CGI was subpar. Most importantly, Tinker Bell herself. The animation and Brit’s vocal work lacked the magic Lasseter expected with this iconic Disney character.

Then, Lasseter himself flushed everything regarding Tinker Bell, $120 million, down the toilet. And Tinker Bell went dark. [...]

[On May 29th,] Disney sent out the below press release, announcing that the new NEW voice of Tinker Bell would be…. Mae Whitman! The 19 year old actress, best known for her voice work on Avatar: The Last Airbender, The Jungle Book 2, Johnny Bravo and Superman. She was also the President’s daughter in Independence Day.

Lest you worry about where that leaves Murphy, the actress will continue to breathe new vocal life weekly into King of the Hill's sexually overstimulated Luanna Platter, while reprising her efforts as Shellie the Abused Barmaid in Sin City 2. Still, after all the multicolored fanfare, we feel somewhat robbed of a Murphy-interpreted Tinker Bell, forever nodding off in some Neverland knothole between bouts of involuntary flatulism and hot faerie-on-faerie action.