We've done it! We've figured out just what set into motion the financial crisis that has led to billions in losses, demolished two investment banks (so far), and led to tens of thousands of lost jobs. It all goes back to Friday, March 7th when sleazy club owner Simon Hammerstein, headband-wearing scenester Arden Wohl, gay party boy Derek Blasberg, heiress Amanda Hearst, and gala staple Claire Bernard turned up at the New York Stock Exchange to ring the closing bell. Clearly, their mere presence at the exchange unleashed some sort of vicious curse on the markets. Don't believe us? Below you'll find a chart that shows the price of Lehman Brothers since that fateful Friday—or "Black Friday" as the day will henceforth be known—and you'll have all the proof you need that this visit was what doomed the storied firm.
Bonus: If you check out the video from their visit, you'll see Derek Blasberg set up some sort of stand so that a vertically-challenged Arden Wohl can see the action on the trading floor. Such a gentleman!