There are many, many ways this vast nation of ours has adapted to various vice laws. Remember during the Giuliani administration when "topless dancing" turned into "stopless dancing," and pretty women were temporarily forced to dance in their underwear? In other backwaters, one must cover up nipples with latex. Now, Iowa's loophole of classifying strip clubs as "performing arts centers" might get closed. Is it an art?! Sure, honey; it's whatever you want it to be. [AP]

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