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Is it possible to turn on the news and not hear about another ship that's been hijacked by a bunch of Somali pirates looking to collect some extortion money? Piracy at sea hasn't generated this much public attention since the 16th century! Naturally, we don't condone these violent, criminal acts, nor do we recommend taking up a career as a pirate, even if you were just canned by a media company or investment bank and you're wondering how you're going to pay your rent next month. But if you've already made up your mind and you're planning to take the LIRR out to the Hamptons, rent a Zodiac, and take over the boat of a local billionaire—or you're just planning to pay a friendly visit and drop off your resume in person—we've put together a colorful chart of yachts owned by a bunch of notable New Yorkers, just so you make sure you're climbing aboard the right ship. Just don't blame us if you're subjected to a treatise on the economy by Steve Forbes, a lecture on Scientology by Greta Van Susteren, or a tongue-lashing by Judge Judy. The larger chart is here.