Mischa Barton Implores You To Party On Past The Dead-Eyed Pain

We'd like, if we may, to squeeze one more magazine cover into our When Glossies Attack gallery of unjustly uglified celebrity covergirls—inspired, of course, by a shot of Gossip Girl's Blake Lively taken, apparently, moments after a freak steamroller accident. The Fug Girls point us to this Marie Claire cover, featuring none other than fashion-awkward DUI-haver, Mischa Barton. How she succeeded in landing this cover, with nothing much more to promote than a movie inspired by and starring a faux-lesbian Soviet pop group, is certainly a topic for discussion. However, we'd like to focus for a moment on the photo itself:

Not even a smattering of fun gold stars and marching orders to "PARTY ON!" in festive script can remove the dead-eyed, "Welcome to your new Realdoll" stink from this particularly soul-sucking soirée. It kind of makes us want to rough-up a chaise lounge.