With openness comes vulnerability. Vulnerability in the sense of: ‘I’ve ripped my ribcage open for you to see my heart and if you reject it, I think I’ll die.’ And with that level of vulnerability I didn’t notice it happen, but a great deal of defensiveness set in. And it’s really effected many of my relationships. It plays itself out in really destructive ways such as: * Setting unattainably high expectations and then being highly critical when not met. * Instead of listening and having a normal discussion, shutting down completely in angry defensiveness. * Walking away from several professional opportunities because I didn’t think they ‘appreciated’ me. * General paranoia in the form of, “Everyone thinks I’m a space case” kind of garbage.