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Promises, Passages, Wonderland: We'll forgive you if you can't seem to keep your celebrity rehab centers/resorts straight. The current issue of The New Yorker takes a look inside Wonderland, which is where Lindsay Lohan spent some time and where Mike Tyson spent more than a year. Wonderland isn't cheap—a private room runs $58,000 a month and, obviously, the place doesn't take insurance. But it sure is convenient! You can pop in for as little as two or three days at a time, which is great for celebs who want to drum up a little tabloid attention but don't want to pay for the media coverage with a month of their lives. Wonderland has no problem if you'd like to bring your dogs with you. Assuming the withdrawal process hasn't destroyed your appetite, you won't have to worry about inedible cafeteria food. (How does grilled lobster in garlic butter for lunch and Chilean sea bass with plum syrup for dinner sound?) And you can use your cell phone, too, which is a major plus if you need to dial up your dealer while you're there. Of course, Wonderland is hardly the only option if you're looking to take care of your coke or alcohol problem, and you'd like to mingle with a few B-listers at the same time. After the jump, a list of six other rehab resorts popular with the boldface set.

Malibu, CA
Former residents: Robert Downey, Jr., Andy Dick, Ben Affleck, Charlie Sheen, Matthew Perry, Britney Spears, Christian Slater, Diana Ross.

Malibu, CA
Former residents: Mel Gibson, David Hasselhoff, Andy Dick, Natasha Lyonne, Stephen Baldwin.

Betty Ford
Rancho Mirage, CA
Former residents: David Hasselhoff, Keith Urban, Jerry Lee Lewis, Ozzy Osbourne, Chevy Chase, Drew Barrymore, Billy Joel, Liza Minnelli, Bobby Brown, Elizabeth Taylor, Stevie Nicks, Johnny Cash, Alice Cooper.

Cirque Lodge
Sundance, Utah
Former residents: Mary-Kate Olsen, Lindsay Lohan, Eva Mendes, Kirsten Dunst

The Meadows
Wickenburg, Arizona
Former residents: Kate Moss, Robbie Williams, Elle Macpherson.

Center City, Minnesota
Former residents: Liza Minnelli, James Frey, Calvin Klein, Chris Farley

Special Treatment [New Yorker]