Seriously—they're asking their readers in a survey. "Check any of these names if you definitely would NOT buy the next issue of Wired if they were on the cover. Check as many or as few as you like."Our choices:

"Bill Gates Dara Torres Julia Allison Lance Armstrong Steve Jobs Charlie Kaufman John Hodgman Bill Clinton Michael Phelps"

OK! So I'd check off the Wired do-not-want cover list... um, JA, of course, plus the swimmers Torres and Phelps because they're not tech people (also an article about special aerodynamic swimsuits might be interesting), and Clinton, I guess. Does that help?