Michelle Obama just snuck out an email message to Scarlett Johansson and the rest of Barack's secret text message buddies. She promises to reveal the TRUTH about Obama tonight, writing, "I'm planning to share a few stories about the Barack I know." HA! Here's the preview video she made, in which she asks for emotional support from her children, because Barack has abandoned her to focus on HIS elitist political future. The clip is a nice way to bypass the Main Stream Media, but why does it show Michelle vacuuming the convention hall?? That's sexist.

Send an email to Ryan Tate, the author of this post, at ryan@gawker.com.