Gawker
Back in miserable ole England, I didn't work every week. London had 8 hanging days a year, spaced every 6 weeks or so. This is because the city of London had far fewer criminals than the Gawker readership. At Tyburn, where the hangings took place, heads and corpses were preserved and then put on display as advertisement that London was a city where law and order reigned supreme. I've asked Denton to install a vat of formaldehyde on the Gawker HQ rooftop, but there is not enough room amidst the beer pong tables and antiaircraft guns. Instead of embalmed cadavers, I have these posts. Do they work? Not really. If anything, as Gawker's readership has grown, more and more unworthies have managed to sneak in. Blame it on the Montauk Monster. So take this as a warning to stop being such sniping, off-topic, oversharing whiners. You're embarrassing yourselves. And now, as a result of our little discussion earlier, several of you are dead.
Executed:
To those remaining, remember the faithful departed. Then don't fucking act like them.
