Will Pharaoh· Will Smith will star in The Last Pharaoh, playing Taharqa, the actual pharaoh who fought off the Assyrian invasion of Egypt in 677 B.C. Didn't Eddie Murphy play that guy already in the "Remember The Time" video? [Variety] · Jessica Alba will star in An Invisible Sign of My Own, based on an Aimee Bender novel about "a young woman who has retreated from the world and is consumed by numbers and math." Alba, we're told, will play this young woman's totally bangable, much hotter sister. [Variety] · Spanking Shakespeare means different things to different people. To Paramount, it means a movie based on a young adult novel. To us, it reminds us of when he had no access to real porn, so we'd spank it to the Collected Works. What? Horatio was hot. [Variety] · Tom Sizemore has joined the cast of Crash. He's clearly heard about the orgies. Good luck with that one, guys! [THR] · In the Motherhood, a web series starring Chelsea Handler, Leah Remini and Jenny McCarthy based on real mom's stories, received a 13-episode order from ABC. The only surviving cast member is Handler, who'll be joined by Megan Mullally and Cheryl Hines. Don't we love those comediennes for the very fact that they are all the anti-mother? Who wants to see Karen or Mrs. David picking up their kids from soccer practice? [THR]