Piven Gets Caught, Ivana's Duplicitous Scheme Exposed

• Whoops! Jeremy Piven was seen eating a mercury-laden plate of tuna tartare and calamari salad last weekend, although his publicist is now denying the account. [MSNBC]
• "Insiders" say that Ivana Trump and Rossano Rubicondi did not, in fact, marry because they were hopelessly in love, but because it was all part of a deal to stir up some publicity and the two even had a contract drawn up. Our faith in romance has been crushed! [NYDN]
• How did the press know Chris Brown was in Miami with Rihanna last weekend? He told them so, silly. In related news, Rihanna is reportedly refusing to testify against him (even though prosecutors plan to move forward). And Brown is scheduled to be arraigned today, although it's unclear if he'll make a courthouse appearance. [P6, NYP, People]
Jeff Toobin changed his Facebook status to "Married" yesterday. That'll clear everything up! [P6]

• Lindsay Lohan is reportedly furious that Katie Holmes landed on the April cover of Glamour instead of her. Settle down, kids. [MSNBC]
• Carla Bruni says she wants to have another baby and if she's too old to get pregnant naturally, she'll think about adopting. [Reuters, People]
• Robin Williams has been has been admitted to an ICU for heart trouble. [NYP]
Robert De Niro and Al Pacino are suing a film distribution company and a watch maker for illegally using their names in their ads. [NYP]
• Bethenny Frankel will do anything to get you to watch her show. The latest? She's been telling her friends she slept with Alex Rodriguez. [NYDN]
Mariska Hargitay was admitted to the hospital yesterday because of "discomfort relating to her earlier lung condition." [E!]
• Now that he's going on tour—and might soon have some money in the bank again—Michael Jackson has filed suit to stop his memorabilia from being auctioned off next month. [Fox 411]
• Guy Ritchie was spotted moving furniture into his new house in London with the help of a "mystery brunette." [Sun]
Michael Strahan is being accused of putting a tracking device inside ex-girlfriend Nicole Murphy's car. [NYP]
• Miley Cyrus is writing an autobiography. Finally! [People]
• Jessica Biel celebrated her 27th birthday Tuesday night by going with Justin Timberlake to see Will Ferrell's show on Broadway. [Us]
• Sherri Shepherd is developing a sitcom about her life for Lifetime. [People]
• Holly Madison of Girls Next Door fame is joining Dancing With the Stars. [Us]