Stephen Colbert's Gift BagWhat does pseudo-nationalist Stephen Colbert give his show's guests in their gift baskets? Lipstick and bacon, zing? No, that's just what a tired hack would say in a weak attempt at a joke, demonstrating why said hack will never be good enough to write for the Colbert Report. The paper of record infiltrated the Colbert green room and found this in the gift bags: "Bottled water. Altoids. Gum. Ground coffee. Tooth whitener. Vodka." In reverse order, that's exactly what politicians consume before going on the show. [City Room]