The best college in the country? That would be the U.S. Military Academy (otherwise known as West Point), believe it or not—at least according to Forbes, which just issued its list of "America's Best Colleges":
The best college in America has an 11:30 p.m. curfew. It doesn't allow alcohol in the dorms, which must be kept meticulously clean. Students have to keep their hair neat, their shoes shined, their clothes crisply pressed. They also receive a world-class education, at no cost, and incur no debt—except for a duty to their country.
You may not incur debt, fine, but we'll assume the fact that you're probably 100 times more likely to die before your 21st birthday wasn't something that was factored into Forbes' ranking system. But as long you're cool with that—and you're not gay, of course!—well, then, you really can't do much better.