Madonna Opens Up; Lindsay Lohan Explains

• Madonna reveals all sorts of juicy, personal stuff in an interview in the November issue of Rolling Stone. Like how she really wanted to work with Eminem, but he turned her down (ouch); how her graffiti tag name back in the '80s was "Boy Toy" (how ironic!); and how she was a total geek in high school, just like every other celeb in the universe. [P6, NYDN]
• Penelope Cruz is making a cameo in the Sex & the City sequel. Get ready to suspend belief: She'll be playing the role of a banker. [People]
• Emanuel Ungaro "creative consultant" Lindsay Lohan is blaming the epic disaster that was her recent fashion show in Paris on "coming in so late and having not that much time to do a whole collection." She also says she's still "learning" and that the negative press isn't going to stop her from returning to Paris in a few months to give it another shot. You go, girl! [People]
• Because he's a romantic at heart, Alex Rodriguez flew to Miami for a single night to take Kate Hudson to dinner. Oh, yea, and to see his kids, too. [P6]

• Leona Lewis got punched in the head by some guy during a book signing in London. No need to worry, though; she'll be fine. [TMZ, Daily Mail]
Mariah Carey's pet name for husband Nick Cannon? "DJ Sexy Fingers." Or at least that's what she had inscribed on his birthday cake. [P6]
• Avril Lavigne has filed for divorce from Sum 41 rocker Deryck Whibley. Just in case you happened to be waiting for that giant piece of news to drop. [Us]
• Katherine Jackson now says that Michael Jackson's kids will not be appearing on an A&E reality show, as was reported yesterday. Wait a few days, though, and they'll come up with another way to exploit these kids so that Jermaine Jackson can afford his daily supply of hair gel. [Us]
• Maria Shriver has apologized for repeatedly (and illegally) driving while talking on her cell. She says she'll be donating her old phone to a "program that helps domestic violence shelters" to make up for it, but what her "old phone" has to do with anything is unclear. Isn't it the current one that's causing all the trouble? [TMZ]
• On the red carpet at an LA club the other night, Joe Francis threatened, "If I see Brody Jenner, he is dead," and also casually mentioned that Jenner has "the smallest penis I have ever seen." Then Francis saw Jenner and his posse inside, got really scared, and did nothing. [P6]
• Jon Gosselin says he plans to "continue on television." Ominous! [NYDN]
• The paramedic on trial for trying to extort John Travolta after his son's death says he couldn't have possibly demanded $25 million in hush money because he can't even count to a million. Case dismissed! [TMZ, Daily News]
• Model-turned-actress Michelle Monaghan threw a baby shower for Victoria's Secret model Karolina Kurkova the other day. Fellow model Adriana Lima was there, too, so basically it was a pretty ugly crowd overall. [P6]
• In other Victoria's Secret model news, Miranda Kerr is looking dangerously skinny these days. [Daily Mail]