Oprah may have been vibrating out in Chicago, but Tina Fey nearly burst with relief at Sarah Palin's expulsion back to Alaska on Tuesday. "I have to retire just because I have to do my day job,” she told Entertainment Weekly this morning, suggesting Kristin Wiig as her flute-rockin', pageant-walkin' heiress apparent should Palin persist as figure worthy of late-night ridicule. We agree, if only to provide a cannier doppelganger for all those confused, frustrated European photo agencies. [EW]

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