Misdirected Mail, Volume II

People occasionally us bizarre messages that they think they're sending to someone we've profiled on the site. Why do they do that? We really don't know. But they do! Earlier, we shared a few messages we've received recently. Another bunch is below.

Misdirected Mail, Volume II

TV chef Anthony Bourdain probably shouldn't tell random people he meets on vacation that he's going to go "see a show" with them. They might take him seriously!

Misdirected Mail, Volume II

If you want to make a new friend in New York, you may have better luck starting small and working your way up.

Misdirected Mail, Volume II

Do you think the Christie's head of contemporary art is interested in an artist "whose reputation is well established in Florida" and does portraits of Michael Jackson? We're guessing he probably isn't. (But if you're reading this, Brett, and you are, let us know and we'll totally introduce you.)

Misdirected Mail, Volume II

This woman from Germany says Meryl Streep's father "watched her" (babysat?) when she was a kid. And she thinks Meryl's been looking for her. Alrighty then.

Misdirected Mail, Volume II

Looking for construction work? Skip the foreman and go right to the top!

Misdirected Mail, Volume II

We have no idea what's going on here, obviously. It's in Italian. But if you bump into the owner of Da Silvano, you can ask him to decode it.

Misdirected Mail, Volume II

Someone has something hot for Janklow, the hotshot book agent who reps Anderson Cooper and Simon Cowell, among others. And it doesn't involve plain old sex scandal. It's "sex sex scandals," so there are a bunch of them. And they're extra sexy, presumably.

Misdirected Mail, Volume II

If you can't write a three-sentence message without making about 100 spelling mistakes, you probably shouldn't be hunting for a literary agent.

Misdirected Mail, Volume II

Fans of Lou Dobbs are dangerous idiots. You probably already knew that.

Previously: Misdirected Mail, Volume I