Yeah he might have a hot body, but Olympic swimmer and Son of Neptune Michael Phelps is kind of a dweeb. Those ears! That kind of lumbering awkwardness. Sure his glorious be-medaling has emboldened him a bit, but still. So it's funny that he's gone and done what so many newly-rich, videogame-anime-lady-obsessed nerds have done before him: he's found himself an Asian girlfriend.

I mean, look at all these rich nerds with fetching Asian ladies on their arms. We don't want to sound "offensive" but it's just a thing, you know? I mean, it's not like we blame Phelps, that girl is cute in a cocktail waitress-y way (she, um, actually is a cocktail waitress). It's just fun to watch someone nestle into a cliché so fully.

He even brought her home to Mom.

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